Thatβs Coleβs Law.
They said we were blowing it out of proportion.
Because they are bite sized
Itβs a small world.
A friend an I were driving home when I noticed two bright stars in the sky I knew to be planets.
Me: "Do you know what planets those are?"
Him: "I don't know... Mars and Venus?".
Me: "I'm pretty sure they're Venus and Jupiter"
Him: "Yeah, I had no idea. I just pulled two planet names out of my..."
Me: "Uranus?"
Me and my brother (looking after his son) having a conversation after I got back from a short holiday.
Me: I can't get into my house at the moment...
Brother: Why not?
Me: Turns out it flooded while I was away, hot water pipes burst...
Brother: That must have dampened the mood!
Brother proceeds to move his sons mouth into a mock laughing motion as he chuckles to himself.
I was watching the Olympic men's Super combined downhill when I made the comment that the skiers get down the hill pretty quickly (referring to the speedometer that would pop up occasionally).
Without missing a beat my dad said the last U.S. skier made it down the hill Ligety split.
then he blew the lesson way out of proportion
The work of Steven Wright, he's the famous Erudite (comic) scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."
1 Β - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2Β Β - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3Β Β - Half the people you know are below average.
4Β Β - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6 Β - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7Β Β - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 Β - If you want the rainbow, you have got to put up with the rain.
9 Β - All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ...... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.
25 - If at first, you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is a place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
It was a catastrophe of Titanic proportion
It was a war of epic proportions.
He told me he wanted a highlighted line, possibly dashed, as part of an animation (for teaching maths to kids). He has set a decidedly minimalistic but eye-catching style that I need to follow, so after a few tweaks, trying to get the right proportions and a nice look, I turned around to him and asked 'Is this along the right lines'?
It was only after I said it I realised the accidental genius of what I had just said, so I simply had to point it out.
He responded with '...I'll let you off this time.'
