My calculator only has enough power left to do one calculation
I really have to make it count
The power of my nun-chucks
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.
Now she's a small medium at large.
Why can't the power bank see his kids?
Because he has a battery charge
Spider-Man has many incredible powers, including the ability to know how many spiders there are around the world.
He uses his Spider Census.
What does a junkie power ranger say before shooting up?
Why did the power line not go to prom?
Why are pictures of Polar Bears always so powerful?
Because they're on polar roids.
I’ve been experimenting with attaching various kitchen utensils to my power drill
What you call a sea horse with Telekinesis powers?
A Chi-horse
Sorry, this is the worst joke I have ever made
Spider-Man offered to give me spidey powers to invent new quips for him.
I guess you could call it a quip pro quo.
With great power comes...
...a lot of work over a short time.
Probably not Watt you expected, right? I currently currently feel a little resistance to this joke.
My brother dug a hole in the ground, filled it with water then designed a moving staircase that was powered by it.
That well escalated quickly!
My power walk was cut short today
I ran out of extension cord
Great power, great responsibility, etc.
Why can't athiests use exponents?
Because they don't believe in a higher power.
With great power comes...
The legalize cannabis party had a fair few stoners voting for it this past election, but not enough to gain power
That’s a lot of wasted votes
If I ever had identical twin daughters, I'd name the first one Kate....
....and the second one Duplikate.
What do you call peanuts with guns?
Google is riding around on some CHROME rims
Instead of medicine, my hippie girlfriend cured her hemorrhoid using only the "power of positive suggestion."
Like a good Grandpa I share with my 12 yr old Grandson the amazement of r/dadjokes regularly. He thinks you all are totally cool. I told him there is much power here. How? He asked. Let me demonstrate... With the diahrrea song.. I'll start.
Some people think it's gross but it's really good on toast. Diahrrea...
Those German electricians really work together when their Cities have power outages.
Many Hans make light work.
Not to brag, but I have sychic powers.
For example, right now you’re thinking, “It’s psychic, idiot.”
My secret dad power is invisibility
Unfortunately, it only works at parties.
Someone stole my copy of Microsoft Office!
I dont know who you are, but I WILL get you for this. You have my Word.
There's a rather unknown Greek myth that involved Zeus farting so loudly that it caused powerful lightning storms all over Greece. Panic and chaos ensued, and there was widespread looting as fires raged out on control.
Thus began the Zeus Toot Riots.
The neighbor
A new dad:
"They said your dad joke powers start when you have your first child, but I'm feeling no effects."
"...though, weirdly, the neighbor became a comedian recently"
Iron man yielded infinity stones and after the snap, due to stones’ immense power, he died!
Apparently, it turned out to not be his strong suit!
What did one power line say to the other power line?
So I just found out some politicians with bowel problems are unfairly helping other politicians with bowel problems rise to power.
I guess our government has a problem with crohnyism.
I don't think that denial is a powerful thing.
I'll fight anyone who thinks so.
The power of the Magikarp [OC]
I don't plan to put up solar panels.
But if you do, more power to you.
Storm hit today, we lost power
It's ok, we're trying our best to find it
I have finally made it
I have two kids, a three year old daughter and a one year old son. Today as we were driving home, my daughter said for the first time “dad I’m hungry” and I felt the power course through my veins knowing I was about to reach the pinnacle of existence. I delivered the revered line and my wife just looked at me and I knew I had achieved everything in life.
Why were Loki's powers centered around creating illusions?
It allows him to be low-key with his mischiefs.
I just got my husband with my best one yet
I said, “what have I told you about leaving the power tools out where the dogs can reach them?”
He looked really confused and said “What? I didn’t leave anything out”
“because the dog is over here sawing some logs!”
This morning my wife said "I think the power went out last night."
I said "should we ground it?"
Did you hear about Darth Vader daughter Elle?
Her power is on a whole different level!
( just made this up, my daughter eat impressed) lol
A man attacked someone with a small device for powering electronics
He was later charged with battery
Where does Phil Collins record his music?
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