You call them Oedipus — a Greek motherfucker.
I just want you to know I understand
To celebrate the 200th birthday of Charles Darwin, the scientific community joined together for a party. As is common at such gatherings, the Biologists began to argue about what species was the most suited to its environment. Finally after much heated debate, a group of scientists pledged to spend the rest of the year exhaustively researching the Biological record to once and for all determine which creature was the ultimate example of adaptivity and proficiency ever to live.
Yesterday, the results were announced at the National Academy of Sciences. The creature identified as the most adaptive and proficient in Earth's history was a previously unknown animal from the Mesozoic era, a water dwelling insect that thrived for a hundred million years.
It was ... a FishAnt
I've decided to explore the competitive world of extreme kite flying. I pledge to keep grounded, no matter my soaring success.
Pledge, of Allegiance
Even though we've been out of college for years, my fraternity pledge son and I still get together every week to play some pool. This week, we were discussing werewolves and where they fit in the mythical creature hierarchy.
"Werewolves are obviously the best," he says.
"That makes sense you'd like them," I reply. "You're like halfway one already."
"Oh, is it because of this?" he asks, gesturing toward his hair, his beard, his hairy chest.
"No, cause you're a human when the moon's not full."
