Plank Puns

A list of puns related to "Plank"

As a child, I was supposed to walk the plank

We couldn't afford a dog.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ May 21 2021
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My priest prescribed a circuit of crunches, flutter kicks, bicycles, and plank holds for the guilt I confessed about neglecting my stomach muscles during workouts.

I finally received my abs solution.

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👤︎ u/MisterPlumbean
📅︎ May 12 2021
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I thought about dressing up as a plank of wood for halloween

I changed my mind because i would get board quickly.

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👤︎ u/Uglyoldbob
📅︎ Oct 23 2020
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My daughter got two-by-four plank ear adornments.

Is this a new trend, girls getting studs in their ears?

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Nov 10 2020
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Why don't pirates shower before walking the plank?

Because they washup on shore.

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👤︎ u/timthedriller
📅︎ Jun 10 2020
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While redoing the hardwood my wife thought it would be a good idea to toss me a plank. It hit me in the head.

I was floored.

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👤︎ u/simmsnation
📅︎ Feb 02 2020
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I think planks are absolutely hot

(Science joke)

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👤︎ u/DMT_michaelstar123
📅︎ May 06 2020
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A knot in a plank of wood imgur.com/4OARPYD
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👤︎ u/avapoet
📅︎ Mar 06 2017
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Why did the chair break when a plank fell on it?

It had no lumber support

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👤︎ u/PinkAnenome
📅︎ Sep 25 2019
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Why was the pine forced to walk the plank?

Because he was guilty of tree-ason.

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👤︎ u/Pdonkey
📅︎ Mar 18 2019
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Why did the pirate make his prisoner walk the plank?

He didn’t have a dog.

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👤︎ u/jerrysmith815
📅︎ Jan 09 2019
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What do you call wooden planks arranged in a circle?

Board meeting

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👤︎ u/wintertoker
📅︎ Dec 27 2017
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Its so hard to get pirates to walk the plank

They never want to get on board

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👤︎ u/PaxPaw
📅︎ Jan 27 2018
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What is a tiny plank of wood with nothing to do?

A little bored

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👤︎ u/wer190
📅︎ Jun 30 2017
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Why did the plank go to the movies?

Because it was board.

Why did the skateboard go to the movies? Because it was wheely board.

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👤︎ u/ItWasMyWifesIdea
📅︎ Mar 23 2017
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I didn't realise that putting planks of wood in a noose was a capital crime in Italy until an Italian saw me doing it...

and pointed and shouted "That's a hanging offense"

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👤︎ u/BeardFM
📅︎ Jul 25 2016
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I told my son to walk the plank...

...because we can't afford a dog...

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Jun 23 2017
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As a kid I was forced to walk the plank.

We couldn't afford a dog.

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👤︎ u/BellaLugosisChips
📅︎ May 02 2021
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Why did I have to walk the plank?

I don’t have a dog.

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👤︎ u/OttoTheGeezer
📅︎ Apr 26 2021
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When I was a kid, my parents used to make me walk the plank.

We couldn't afford a dog.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Dec 22 2020
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As a kid I was made to walk the plank.

We couldn't afford a dog.

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👤︎ u/Yankee9Niner
📅︎ Sep 10 2020
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When I was younger, I used to walk the plank

We couldn't afford a dog

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👤︎ u/Tinnber
📅︎ Sep 13 2020
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Why did the pirate walk the plank?

Because he couldn't afford a dog.

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👤︎ u/TheCuteInExecute
📅︎ Oct 10 2019
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"When I was a kid, my parents used to make me walk the plank!"

"We couldn't afford a dog."

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Nov 17 2018
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When I was a kid I was made to walk the plank...

We couldn’t afford a dog.

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👤︎ u/InfidelCastrato
📅︎ Jan 10 2019
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