Pick Out Puns

A list of puns related to "Pick Out"

Every year around this time, my family and I go out to the woods to pick out and cut down our own menorah.

Happy Hanukkah dadjokes!

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👤︎ u/kaspm
📅︎ Dec 11 2020
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Which one stole your broom ma’am? Can you pick her out of a line up?

No it was Witch two officer!

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👤︎ u/Texgymratdad
📅︎ Oct 06 2020
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In an attempt to teach him shapes, I told my 2-year-old son to pick out the 3-sided shape with a 90 degree angle. He picked one...

It was the right triangle.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jul 26 2020
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I lost my guitar pick made out of cow bone

I told my brother I lost my bone pick, he said “of course you did”

“I really have a bone to pick with myself for doing that”

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👤︎ u/BradenMer
📅︎ Jul 01 2020
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My wife asked, “Wanna come with me to help pick out some vinyl wood blinds?”

I said, “Faux sho.”

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👤︎ u/zedhead0628
📅︎ Apr 21 2020
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An aspiring beekeeper went to a farmer’s market to pick up a small hive. They placed an order for a dozen bees. When picking up the bees, the seller handed them a case of thirteen bees. Noticing the extra bee, the keeper pointed it out to the seller.

The seller said, “Oh, that last one is a freebee!”

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👤︎ u/gothwhopper
📅︎ Oct 17 2019
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How do you pick a stoner out of a line up?

You simply WEED 'em out

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👤︎ u/SilverLantern2814
📅︎ Dec 05 2019
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Shout out to my legs who are always there to pick me up when I'm down.
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👤︎ u/frugalwater
📅︎ Dec 29 2018
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A guy came by my workshop today to pick up a replica of his butt that I molded out of silicone

He literally had his ass handed to him.

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👤︎ u/DandeLion-King
📅︎ Dec 17 2014
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I asked my wife to help me pick out some new music on Spotify.

She gave me some sound advice.

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👤︎ u/lucidus_somniorum
📅︎ Sep 25 2017
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If you take the "ick" out of "Pick" aren't you still left with P? imgur.com/B65ZV9U
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👤︎ u/RuSsYjO
📅︎ Jun 24 2015
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Little mary jane was walking down the street with her mother. Her mother saw a quarter in the road and went out to pick it up and got hit by a bus.

Little mary jane just LAUGHED and LAUGHED.... she knew it was only a nickle.

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👤︎ u/questionall101
📅︎ Dec 09 2018
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How do you pick out a blind man in a nudist colony?

It's not very hard.

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👤︎ u/winnieismydog
📅︎ Dec 08 2017
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My dad went out to pick up my hemorrhoid medication yesterday

When he came back, he put it on the table and texted me, "Your meds are here. I hope it rectifies your problem."

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👤︎ u/DoctorDash
📅︎ Mar 27 2015
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My mother asked me to pick up chocolate coins for the kids on the way to her Hanukkah party. When the store on my route didn't have any and I showed up with regular chocolate, she started crying and begged me to go back out to a different store.

I yelled, "No mom! I'm so sick of your gelt trips!"

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👤︎ u/HandsomePurpleDino
📅︎ Dec 11 2017
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Went to pick out pumpkins with my wife.

Me: "Wow, these are gourd-geous..."

Her: "You're walking home."

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👤︎ u/TinBritches
📅︎ Oct 23 2016
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My wife and daughter are out school shopping. I asked them to pick me up a grade school.
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👤︎ u/it_burns_69
📅︎ Aug 10 2015
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I went with my dad to help pick out a new pair of shoes.

the sales person points to the newly puchased shoes and says: "would you like to wear them out?"

he replies: "I hope not."

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👤︎ u/rjgarc
📅︎ Jan 17 2014
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