A list of puns related to "Peeps"
Guess we knead the dough
Your Pixar Good.
... such crap
But I think it's pretty metal.
One is rude and nosy, the other is nude and rosy.
Because itβs very hard for them to lurk from home.
Because he always peaked.
It was the pot calling the cattle back.
Edit: Thank you for the awards.
I was expecting this to go noticed like most of my other posts. You peeps rock!
Peeko-da-guyo
The dirtiest clean joke I know...
What's the difference between a pick pocket and a peeping tom?
A pick pocket snatches watches.
Credit to Redd Foxx
The pickpocket snatches your watch. The peeping tom does the opposite.
Group of peeps I hang out with are making good Halloween puns involving their user. I need one that can make use of either Vince, Vincevaleker, e11, or Valeker. Any ideas?
Thatβs the peak time
I didn't want to hear another Peep out of him.
In the bushes, outside the window.
I missed hanging with my peeps.
I wasnβt supposed to use fowl language.
Couldn't get a Peep out of him.
a microwave
I know this might not be the place to post a question but I was wondering if any of you punny peeps can help me out? I got some free stamps and I want to mail a few potatoes out to my relatives. I know this is pretty stupid and a waste of time but I'm laughing at myself just thinking what their reactions and responses will be when they check their mailbox and see a potato. I want to write a potato pun somewhere on the potato. So of you're willing to help me do this; please leave me your potato puns for me to read and decide which ones I'll be using. Thank you for reading.
A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the birdβs mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the birdβs attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to clean up the birdβs vocabulary. Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. John, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that heβd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Johnβs outstretched arms and said βI believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. Iβm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.β John was stunned at the change in the birdβs attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke up, and asked very softly : βMay I ask what the turkey did?β
I'd like to thank my friend John for sending me this dumb joke
So I took some peeps into work today, and at our daily meeting I presented some to everyone.
I then pointed to my boss and said "He's the boss."
I then ripped the head off of the peep in my hand, reattached it, pointed back at my boss and repeated "He's the boss."
I was reminding my peeps who's boss.
The nurse said she barely made a peep. She's such a relaxed baby she'll trick us into having another.
It'll take more than that to outsmart me, baby. Only one of us was born yesterday
What did the rooster say to greet the rising sun?
βLet me sing for you the song of my peeps.β
... would it be a 'peeping tome'?
I didn't make a Peep.
I'm a peep-hole person.
For reference: Link to wiki
Some of these are done in a kind of "news headline"-style:
Choir leader fired after using too much sexual innuendo; "Lewd Ex Cantor."
Video on demand about a street where nothing happens; "Vod of the Boring Alley."
Man's brutal cousin turns out to be a great bloke; "Raw-Ted, Great Dude".
Panic spreads as toilet facilities take over the world; "Cry! Stall-Age."
A man orders a book of basic letters to look after his daughters belongings while he looks after the others; "ABC, Watch Her's!".
Sams brother cheats a dude; "Dean Cons the Peep."
A ride in the amusement park offers a wide range of emotions; "High! Low! Woo! Nah."
A weird and hard to describe new dessert; "Cold Lemon Thing."
A new star in stand up rises! Come see "Puntiff Sulyvahn."
Pirates start eating fava beans and a new drink is required; "Yo! Ho! The Chianti!."
A Long lived man has an unusual apetite for fish; "Old-Rick, Devourer of Cods".
In Bacteria-Town, a devastating disease strikes one inhabitant working at a hotel; "Cancer of the Borrelia Valet".
Roman god Cubid is ordered to take a woman to cave and kill her; "Drag and Slay Her Amor"
Osiris's statue has been in way too many marriages and people have started to call it; "Osiris the Consummated Thing."
The choir leader from before is transformed into a mushroom; "Champignon Cantor"
An english man becomes the leader of a Polish airplane company and gets nicknamed; "LOT-Rick"
An impatient tree person attacks a random mythical hunter; "Antsy Ent! Why Hern?!"
Horse named Elvis keeps making noise and a man shouts;"Neigh Less King!"
A child opens a chocolate egg and a white spirit jumps out; "Soul of Kinder"
Sorry about the possible typos.
Bow Peep https://imgur.com/gallery/08zNH
Years ago I used to use a LexisNexis database of companies that would give corporate information like name, address, and general business description. While most of them were pretty bland, there were a bunch of them with some really cheesy puns, and over a few years I built quite a collection.
Today I share with you "NEXIS IS RIDICULOUS.txt":
We're all ridiculously tired and the father peeps up "Looks like everyone's bubble burst"
My sigh was strong.
So, you take a beaker and fill it with 1000 ml of water. You then stuff purple Easter marshmallow treats into the beaker until it is completely full of peeps. What do you have?
...
A purple peep liter!
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