audiophile twitter puns
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Megaman0201
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2018
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The CFL's Calgary Stampeders have some top notch twitter punning twitter.com/calstampeders…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gutterferret
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2016
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A Bishop's Twitter Post
πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRealAjmera
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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A man walks into his doctor’s office and says, β€œDoctor, I think I’m addicted to Twitter.”

The doctor looks at him and says, β€œSorry, I don’t follow you."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
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Female Twitter post...Do men still open car doors ?

Comment: "Well yeah! How the fuck do we get inside?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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Saw this European Union ad on Twitter
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blackbird1251
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
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Why does Lord Voldemort have Twitter, but not Facebook?

He only has followers, not friends.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wimpykidfan37
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
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Shamelessly stolen on twitter, no clue about who did that. I have to dig something here...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/goelin
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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Twitter meme s t o l e n from facebook
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oakvard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
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Twitter has gone too far! Now they're banning Mario for threatening the President.

Evidently he found out that Trump was in Peach twice.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jodyleblanc
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
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Twitter might ban you if you post a COVID joke.

But there is a 95% chance you won’t get it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikeiscool81
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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Bronnection.. found it on twitter
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ken_1712
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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How I got blocked on Twitter

Girl: why does every reference of Steve Irwin make me cry?

Me: Does it makes you cry β€œcrocodile tears?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chaddtalks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
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I started a twitter account devoted to non-sequitors but had to shut it down

No followers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/billbixbyakahulk
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
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YouTube, Twitter and Facebook are merging...

They’ll henceforth be known as YouTwitFace.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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I love Twitter
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Samyam2896
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2019
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of course no-one appreciated this on twitter
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ICTman1076
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2020
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When you are in charge of the twitter account during national battery day
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DidrikNL
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
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A man tells his doctor : "Doc, help me, I'm addicted to Twitter"

The doctor replies : "Sorry I don't follow you..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
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let me tell you the twitter handle of a horror company out of this world

@mustfear

edit : thisnisna dad joke. not intended as an actual twitter handle search.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alphabluewolf
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
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I love twitter
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hopoffZ
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
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Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube are shutting down tonight at Midnight PMT due to COVID-19 pandemic

A very proactive step to reduce the likelihood of anything else going viral.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kuriakon
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2020
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What's the difference between Twitter and Game of Thrones?

Twitter only allows 140 characters.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
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This is why I wood recommend Twitter
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JGesick
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2018
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This is Arnold's profile pic on Twitter. i.reddituploads.com/20fc6…
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fat_Hitchhiker
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2017
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Phenomenal twitter thread imgur.com/a/2B1YBYh/
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aus10w
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
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YouTube’s founder Twitter account:

1,920 Following 1,080 Followers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2020
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Why does Voldemort prefer Twitter to Facebook? /r/harrypotter/comments/e…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bluebanana5735
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
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Mr. Pickle has a decent following on twitter...

He's kind of a big dill

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JBaczuk
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
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I got a new job monitoring someone’s twitter and Instagram messages

It’s per DM

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ApplewoodWarrior
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
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Why is Trump always posting on Twitter so much?

Because he's completely phony.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/slacy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
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Credit to @TheHippocrit on Twitter
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TurtlerTim
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2019
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Thanks sonic Twitter very cool
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imonandroid
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
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I'm so glad that the twitter # was "hashtag" instead of "pound"

Otherwise the #metoo movement would have been awkward.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BGG-prone
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2018
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I told my doc I need help because I'm addocted to Twitter...

Doc said he doesn't follow.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlrdyturntupD
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
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For Halloween, one of my sons dressed up as the clown from IT, and another son as a Twitter hashtag. They asked me my opinion...

I said "Penny wise, pound foolish"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/voip_geek
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
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If Jesus were alive and on Twitter...

He’d probably have a lot of followers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lawnswizzle82
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
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OJ Simpson joined Twitter...

...I think to promote a brand of orange juice.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alltime75
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
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This Twitter bio is top-NOTCH
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πŸ‘€︎ u/verifypassword__
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Doctor you've got you help me, I'm addicted to twitter.

Doctor: I don't follow you.

πŸ‘︎ 210
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πŸ‘€︎ u/red_snake0329
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
🚨︎ report
a lady goes to the doctor and says I’m addicted to Twitter

the doctor says I don’t follow you

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zaiddortegaa
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Doctor! Doctor! I'm addicted to Twitter.

I don't follow you.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1963Jan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
🚨︎ report
Doctor you've got you help me, I'm addicted to twitter.

Doctor: I don't follow you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
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Doctor you've got you help me, I'm addicted to twitter.

Doctor: I don't follow you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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