How’s the fission, John?
Then one spine turns and says to the other “we missed the bus!!”
His name is Tentin’ Quarantino.
dad: Pear with fig make a great pair *wink wink*
daughter: go figure
"I have no idea," the captain says, "but he goes nuts every year when we pass him."
He said that's music to his heirs
An R2-D Toot
A prosti-toot!
My first thought was how how how how?
He sits in his own pew.
Unable to resist the temptation, Brian goes into the shop. "I am the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make. I'd very much like to listen to the new LP you have advertised in the window."
"Certainly, Sir," says the young man behind the counter. "If you'd like to step into the booth and put on the headphones, I'll put the LP on for you."
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps, goes into the booth and puts on the earphones.
Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth and announces, "I am the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I recognized none of those."
"I'm sorry Sir," says the young assistant. "If you'd care to step into the booth, I can let you have another 10 minutes."
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds they make, steps back into the booth and replaces the headphones. Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth shaking his head. "I don't understand it," he says, "I am the worlds leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make, and yet I still can't recognise any of those!"
"I really am terribly sorry," says the young assistant, "I've just realised I was playing you the bee side!"
Dad: He's not going to sell many ice creams going at that speed!
cringeee
Dad:Do you know many dead people are in this grave yard? Me;uhh... 200? DAD:ALL OF THEM!!!!
I went to the transportation office at work with my coworker who was in need of a new parking pass. I don't drive to work, so I did not need to be there.
Parking Pass Attendant (to me): "Do you need a parking pass too?"
Me: "No thanks, I don't have a car."
Parking Attendant jokingly: "You should get one anyway and wear it around your neck"
Me: "I think wearing a car around my neck would get pretty heavy after a while"
"Did you know we're driving by the dead centre of town?"
I read license plate - "Where do you think he's from?"
Dad - "Well I think he's from Krypton."
"I'm experiencing packet loss"
^It's ^a ^networking ^term ^joke ^my ^friend ^dropped ^lastnight ^at ^maccas
my dad points and says "wow, looks like business is dead"
How’s the fission, John?
