Rick Astley rents the movie Up from the rental store, 3 weeks later he gets a call from the rental store employees saying that his rental is 3 weeks overdue, what does Rick Astley say?

Never gonna give you Up!

👍︎ 10
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📅︎ Jul 08 2020
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I got a letter saying I had to pay an overdue exorcist bill.

They said if I didn't, my house would be repossessed.

👍︎ 4k
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📅︎ Oct 12 2016
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If it's overdue, don't overdo.
👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/Kauntest
📅︎ Sep 24 2018
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My wife is almost a week overdue, and is just now starting to have contractions

It's time to make like a fetus and head out this mother

👍︎ 7
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📅︎ Jul 08 2016
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Police are appealing to the man that robbed the library

To come quietly

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/tiger7971
📅︎ Oct 06 2020
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I saw my dentist walking down the street the other day...

He was shaking his head and looking at his watch. He said I'm overdue for an appointment and that he has an opening today. I asked what time can I come in? He smugly replied "tooth hurty".

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/Yogisogoth
📅︎ May 03 2020
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Our new librarian is very polite and I think she is Italian...

I took a book back that was months overdue, but rather than charging me, she just said, "That's-a-fine."

👍︎ 6
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📅︎ Apr 10 2020
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Please join me in remembering my sister, she would have been 28 today.

But she was born overdue and her birthday is next week.

👍︎ 35
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📅︎ Aug 26 2019
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My Dad's, Dad joke.

(We are from Montana.)

Montana and North Dakota are in the middle of a war. The NDs have amassed a huge army and are about to march over a hill to invade MT. The commander of the ND army decides to send out a couple of scouts to see if the way is clear. Almost immediately after the two scouts disappear over the top of the hill, loud crashing and rumbling sounds come from the direction they went. After waiting until they are overdue for return, the commander decides to send a squad over to check out what happened. As they pass out of sight, a loud raucous was again heard from the other side of the hill. The commander becomes concerned and decides not to wait for them to return. He sends an entire platoon over the hill, telling them to take out any resistance they meet and return with any survivors. Once again, as the men disappear over the hill, the terrible sounds of war rush over the entire army and then slowly die down until nothing could be heard but the beating of the commanders heart. A proud man, never before defeated in battle, he decides to lead the entire army over the hill himself to destroy the opposition once and for all, but as they begin to march they see a single, mangled, ND soldier pulling himself up over the top of the hill by the only functioning limb of his body. Beaten, bloody and near death, he manages, with help, to make it to the commander and says; "Sir... (cough) Don't go... (spit, cough) It's a trap..."

And in the surprise induced silence he says;

"There's TWO of 'em."

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Dec 13 2013
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Our new librarian is very polite and I think she is Italian...

I've just taken a book back that was months overdue but, rather than charging me, she just said, "That's-a-fine."

👍︎ 4k
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 27 2017
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Our new librarian is very polite and I think she is Italian...

I just took a book back that was months overdue, but rather than charging me, she just said, "That's-a-fine!"

👍︎ 9
💬︎
📅︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report

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