A clown held a door open for me.

It was a nice Jester.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OffDutyTaoist
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
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I'm running a D&D campaign and I figured out the best riddle for the players to solve to open a door.

"Take thine father's blade and ascend!"

>!The solution is Pa's Sword 1234!<

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AFonziScheme
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Yesterday when I walked into a store, a clown held the door open for me.

I thought it was a nice jester

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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Singers might open doors with their talents, but thieves can do it off key.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ForestValkyrie
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
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Why should you always knock on the fridge door before you open it?

Because there could be a salad dressing!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thisDiff
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
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Why are open doors good for storing things?

Because they are ajar

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/geckheck
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
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I'm sick and tired of people coming into my house, trying to sell me books, and then just marching out and leaving the door wide open.

Were these people born in a Barnes and Noble or something?

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhatProtomolecule
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2021
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Female Twitter post...Do men still open car doors ?

Comment: "Well yeah! How the fuck do we get inside?"

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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When one door closes another opens

Other than that it's a pretty good car.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jimalexp
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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My uncle always said "when one door closes another door opens"

Great guy,terrible kitchen fitter.

πŸ‘︎ 68
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nnmgRandomness
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
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My grandfather always used to say, β€œAs one door closes another one opens.”

Lovely man.

Terrible cabinet maker.

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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How do you open a green door

With a chroma key

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DutchBlob
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
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So last night my boyfriend left the bedroom door open to get more heat in the room because there are more heating vents in the hallway than in the bedroom. I said, "You might say it's eVENTful." He didn't laugh. So then I said, "You'll laugh eVENTually."
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lovina9
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
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Before he passed away, my grandfather said, β€œHere are three words that would help open a lot of doors for you.”

Push and Pull.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Just open the door!
πŸ‘︎ 173
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RajuNeupane
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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grandpa told me: "if a door closes somewhere, another opens

he was a really bad cabinet maker...

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kevin_flu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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My grandpa always told me "when one door closes another one opens."

A lovely and inspiring man...makes shit cabinets though.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
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People weren't happy with me for leaving the front door at work open overnight.

I walked into a chilly reception.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IlltimedYOLO
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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Just came home to find all my doors and windows open, everything's gone!

Who would do that to another person's Advent Calendar?!

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flabbergash
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
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On a recent flight, my friend asked me, β€œIf the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?”

I said, β€œNo, we will still be friends.”

πŸ‘︎ 201
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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My last relationship ended because I didn't open the car door for her...

Instead I swam up to the surface.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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You know your supposed to knock on the refrigerator door before you open it

Cuz there might be a salad dressing

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tjeters
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
My dad always said "as one door closes another one opens"

He never quite got the hang of assembling Ikea furniture.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Benmark97
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
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Do you know what a ghost uses to open a door ?

His spookey.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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What do you call a cute button, which on pressing norifies the house owner to open the door?

Adoorbell.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/inoobie_am
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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What do you call a door that doesn't open?

A jar.

Edit:

Apparently this isn't original, and there's a "real" version of this joke.

When is a door not a door?

When it’s ajar.

Thanks for the correction, u/TheRealTripleH !

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πŸ‘€︎ u/a_singh510
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
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In a recent poll, 80% of people in America said they would not open their homes to a sentient water basin that walked up to their door and asked for shelter…

Let that sink in…

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
A clown held the door open for me yesterday /r/Jokes/comments/inof00/…
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/midgetgamer27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
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My office door would not stay open.

I finally put a stop to that.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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I am pulling my hair out to think of that R & B singer who opens doors

Alopecia Keys

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Goldygold2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
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I was on a family vacation in Japan when I slept in one day. My dad flung open my door and told me to wake up. I said, β€œDad, what do you think this is?...

...the Land of the Rising Son?”

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Campagnolo412
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
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My grandad always said: "When one door closes, another one opens"...

...Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.

πŸ“· Removed - Punchline in title

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrGonzoDog
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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Wheeeen youuuu open the doors and you see lots of drawers

That's armoire

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kmartinator
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I normally knock on the fridge door before I open it...

Just in case there’s a salad dressing

πŸ‘︎ 15k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/omniwrench-
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I always knock on the fridge before I open the door...

Just in case there is a salad dressing.

I'll see myself out....

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thirteen_20
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the clown hold the door open?

Because it's a nice jester

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ginks_21
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
🚨︎ report
I normally knock on the fridge door before I open it...

Just in case there's a salad dressing

πŸ‘︎ 211
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πŸ‘€︎ u/laserspewpew_
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Hold the door open for a clown

It's a nice jester.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/araitisaname
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
🚨︎ report
A clown held the door open for me

It was a nice Jester

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AshamedTurtwig
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
My grandfather always said that when one door closes, another one opens.

He was a terrible cabinetmaker.

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lwp1331
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A clown held the door open for me today

I thought that it was a nice jester

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AggressiveLikes
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I held the door open for a clown

It was a nice Jester

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AshamedTurtwig
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
On his deathbed, my grandfather said, β€œRemember these two words. It’ll open a lot of doors for you in life.”

Push and Pull.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2019
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The other day I held the door open for a clown

It was a nice jester.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lez566
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
🚨︎ report
When one door closes, another one opens

Other than that, it’s a pretty good car.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomBradyGoat1212
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
In a recent poll, 80% of people in America said they would not open their homes to a sentient water basin that walked up to their door and asked for shelter.

Let that sink in.

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/corbimatic
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
🚨︎ report
A clown held the door open for me today.

That was a nice jester.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brockycorn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
🚨︎ report

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