Lucius Aelius Puns

This post doesn't contain anything in the way of new information, but perhaps an interesting tidbit. I was reading a History of Rome and came upon the person of Lucius Aelius Sejanus, or simply Sejanus, and it led me to believe that he was likely the historical inspiration for Janos' character. GRRM has spoken multiple times of drawing inspiration from history for his characters and plots. Seeing as Sejanus has never been mentioned here, I thought it might interest someone.

• Like Janos, Sejanus was a commoner raised to a position of prominence as the head of the Praetorian guard, the personal army of the Emperor and a reasonable analog of the City Watch.

• Eventually Janos becomes Lord of Harrenhal while Sejanus becomes effective emperor and co-consul with Tiberius, both untoward positions for someone of their birth.

• They both are guilty of corruption and for using their position as head of a private army to advance their careers.

• Sejanus served an absentee emperor in the person of Tiberius, while Janos served an absentee king, Robert Bartheon.

• Once their actions come to light, Janos is exiled to the wall, and Sejanus is executed.

Anyway, they certainly aren't the same person, but there are enough similarities, plus the name, that I am decently confident GRRM knew who Sejanus was and Janos was based off his life.

RED RISING

As Mustang is pulling leather from Darrow's wound after his whipping at Pax's hand, he cries out, "Shit on a pike!" Doubt it was meant as foreshadowing at the time, but it sure as shit...no pun intended...evokes "butts on poles" upon relisten. Thanks, HowlerPod for that lovely phrase.

GOLDEN SON

1. After Darrow's disgrace, he's discussing his situation with Victra and he speculates that Pliny may have played "a part" in his downfall. Victra then replies, "A part?" Especially resonant in the audiobooks, this is later echoed when Lorn says to Aja that House Arcos stands apart, to which she says, "Apart?"

2. Another juxtaposition of lines. Evey's vanity in her connection to Darrow compared to Darrow's mother's genuine knowledge of him. After Evey brings Darrow back to Harmony's den following their attempted assassination of the Jackal, she says, "I could recognize you anywhere." Of course, she didn't catch on until Darrow's name had been mentioned. In contrast, Deanna recognized her son upon his return to their home despite knowing nothing of his resurrection and skinny dip in gold. "It's you" are the first words she says to him, later following with "I would know you...anywhere." I love that Deanna's words are true, like someone recognizing someone else in an entirely different sleeve from the Altered Carbon universe whereas Evey didn't recognize a person in the same sleeve but with elaborate make-up on.

MORNING STAR

1. Shout out to Breakfast Club: When Darrow has Cassius brought to his stateroom on the Morning Star, they are chitchatting about old Roman fashions, and Cassius mentions that, in his father's day, the Society tried bringing back togas during drinking bouts and breakfast clubs.

2. Bit o' History: As Darrow's fleet approaches Luna, he is hailed by the Praetorians. The Gold doing the hailing says, "I am ArchLegate Lucius au Sejanus of the Praetorian Guard, First Cohort." Lucius Aelius Sejanus was an actual prefect of the Praetorian Guard under the Roman emperor Tiberius.

3. Confusion: In what I will call the Debate of Ilium, I cannot understand why Darrow offered the Sons of Ares BEFORE he played his "Roque has 30MT nukes!" card. If you've reasonsed it out, please illuminate me.

4. Battle of Ilium: Pierce has already scored this. Darrow mentions that a deep drumbeat version of the Forbidden Song is piped through his ship as the fleets approach each other. Darrow also mentions that he leads Pax (ship) on a suicide mission. T

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

I am Lucius Aelius Aurelius Commodus, son of the deified Marcus, master of the civilized world, Emperor of Rome.

You would do well to consider me a god.

Recently, under circumstances that I feel no particular inclination to share, I encountered this movie you call “Gladiator.”

I was not entertained.

To the baser elements of the mob, I suppose, it might seem watchable. The opening battle is impressive enough, as are the scenes set in the city of Rome (though half the buildings are out of place). Despite glaring inaccuracies, the gladiatorial combats are creative and exciting. The music is evocative, if you like that sort of thing.

But all of this vanishes beside the grossly slanderous portrait of myself.

Who is Joaquin Phoenix? Who is this sickly imposter, this devious incompetent, this commoner who dares to assume my name? What has he to do with me? Where in him is the glory of Commodus? Where is the commanding eye, the Herculean figure, the leonine hair, the luxuriant beard?

Phoenix, I grant, has a certain degree of flair (I have ordered my artificers to copy that fetching white armor he wears in the final battle with Maximus). He has a measure of my godlike skill in the gladiatorial arts, exhibits a seemly zest for the games, and is justly disdainful of all things senatorial. In every other respect, however, his false Commodus is an abomination!

I shall focus on the most egregious errors.

I did not kill the deified Marcus. My father never dreamt of giving power to the Senate, and made me his co-emperor long before his death. I gained nothing from his passing.

Although Phoenix manages to convey my loathing of the Senate – I rather liked the scene where he plays with his sword while the senators natter on about drainage – he is far too gentle with them. Nothing forestalls sedition like a timely execution or two. Much though I might like to, however, I have never attempted to disband the senate entirely. Even senators have their uses.

I have no inappropriate urges toward my sisters (I killed Lucilla, of course, but that was nothing personal). The vicious rumors to the contrary should not be countenanced.

Last but certainly not least, I have never heard of any general-turned-gladiator named Maximus. Who is this Maximus? Who is this unlikely hero, unstoppable in the arena, beloved by my traitorous sister Lucilla, empowered to establish the Senate – the Senate! – in control of Rome? He is nobody! He is nothing! He never existed!

Every

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

You take away their little brooms

It was about a weak back.

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”