Irenic Puns

IHOP

...unlike the rest of the people in the car who probably died screaming, “Irene! Irene! Wake up! Wake Up!!

Dealing with home services and customers, need to check ID. Routine ID check and I though the customer's name was Irene so I say "Ok Irene, let's get into your account here..."

Icene: "It's Icene"
Me: "Oh wow, really? double checks ID Wow! That's wicked, I've never heard that name before that's really interesting!"
pause
Me: "Well... I guess, now Icene it."

Icene groans, and my coworker and his customer start laughing, and I couldn't help but smile :D

She was in charge of the hops.

Eileen

My 2 yr old is constantly dropping small toys down the grate on the air return and a couple rolled out if site. This morning, I stuck my head down it and found a couple the had been missing for a couple weeks. Yay, dad!

My wife told me "She likes to drop her toys down there when she's angry."

I told her "you can't be upset. She's just venting!"

Groans and laughs ensued.

Edit: "this morning." What the hell is a kornint?

Irene

Ilene.

What does an Asian woman call herself when she’s leaning on a building?

Irene

Eileen.. Unless she's from Asian descent and then she would be Irene.

Aileen Unless she's Asian, then you call her Irene.

Irene

What do you call a Woman with one leg?

"Eileen."

What do you call a Chinese Woman with one leg?

"Irene."

What do you call a woman with one leg longer than the other?

Eileen

What do you call a Japanese woman with one leg longer than the other?

Irene