Asked Mork what kind of iPod he had. He said

Nano Nano

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DanielSternsBeard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic

It’s syncing now

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
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I chanjed my ipods name to 'titanic'

It's syncing now

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Cosmic_Kitten
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
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There was a break in at the electronics shop near us...They took all the iPads, iPods and iPhones....

It was an Apple turnover.

One made up by my dad! He's so impressed with himself for making it up he has told the joke where ever possible over the past few years!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mnice17
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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[OC] Did you hear about the thief that got caught stealing an iPhone, an iPad and an iPod?

He’s now an iCon.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PadiddleWink
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2019
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My dad's the kind that types messages with too many exclamations... I guess I got my hopes up with his new iPod.
πŸ‘︎ 397
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SlurryBender
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2013
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My good friend lost his iPod...

...he found it a week-ish later in his pet rabbit's cage.
I told my husband about the situation and he said:

"O that's unfortunate. He was probably trying to listen to some hip-hop."

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2015
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We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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Seahorse
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CocoBandicoot99
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
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My favorite dad joke
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/i_eversaw
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2013
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Dad joked(?) the old guy at work this morning

I do maintenance on overnights at a department store. We're able to get away with quite a lot of joking around thankfully so it really isn't all that bad

Anyways, it's about 6 or 6:30 in the morning. The daytime employees are just making their way in for the day. Suddenly, I'm paged over the system by the old guy I work with on maintenance

"MetalHeadCrow, where are you?"

I love working with the old guy. He's a great worker and we really get along good. So, I run to the nearest phone, pick it up, and page for the whole store to hear:

"I'm right here, where are you?"

I was happy with myself

EDIT: I'm using my iPod to post so not sure how this will look. Also added a few words

πŸ‘︎ 801
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalHeadCrow
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2015
🚨︎ report
Great list of excellent puns

How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crΓͺpes.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop

any time.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd

never met herbivore.

When chemists die, they barium.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

Why were the Indians in America first? They had reservations.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she

couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pointless.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A theasaurus.

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. The

police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro - what a rip off!

Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.

My friend sent me these puns idk source just thought you would enjoy

πŸ‘︎ 213
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/benschweiz
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2016
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No matter how much you push the envelope,

it'll still be stationery.

If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the crossed-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

When chemists die, they barium.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

This girl today said she recognized me from the Vegetarians Club, but I'd swear I've never met herbivore

I know a guy who's addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A. I got some batteries that were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine last week is now fully recovered. He had a photographic memory but it was never fully developed.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.

Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.

Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the ends.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PewPewWizard2000
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2018
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Just one day Dad, please stay Dad-Joke abstinent for just ONE DAY

(On getting a good book for Christmas from my Grandma) > Me: "Aw thanks Grandma I'll read that with delight" >> Dad: "Who's Delight?"

πŸ‘︎ 96
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cygw1n
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
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Friend's dad pulls one at dinner

So it was MT friend's birthday, to celebrate she invited us all over to her house for some dinner.

They've got a pretty big house, and a sweet sound system set up with speakers in each room, so you could play music and everyone in the house will hear it.

So we're all talking and joking around over dinner, my friend hooked up her iPod to the sound system and Ed Sheeran is playing in the background

At this point, her dad comes over to chat

Dad: "So, how do you guys like my house music?"

Friend: "That's not house music dad..."

Dad: "Yeah it is! This is my house, and there's music playing in it, so it's house music!"

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Frosty015
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2014
🚨︎ report
I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.
πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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I named my IPod Titanic

It’s syncing now

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
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I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. Now it's syncing.
πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jamesbond10000
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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iPod

I Renamed my iPod The Titanic, so when I plug it in, it says β€œThe Titanic is syncing.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Petar-Hr
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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I renamed my IPod "Titanic"

It's syncing as we speak.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dumb-reply
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
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I renamed my IPod to Titanic.

It’s syncing.

πŸ‘︎ 53
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/That-One-Person2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
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I bought an iPod and named it the Titanic

it's syncing

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
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I named my Ipod as Titanic

And it's syncing

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HutPlayer
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
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I renamed my iPod 'Titanic'.

It's Syncing now...

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xConflict
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2014
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked my mum after a few years of buildup

Background: had this ipod for forever, got a new one and gave the old one to my mum, she was putting more music on it.

Mum: Why did you name your ipod the Titanic? I never got the joke.

Me: So when you plug it in, the Titanic is syncing.

πŸ‘︎ 135
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/suigenic
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2014
🚨︎ report
What do you call a space-pod you can put yourself in?

An Ipod

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nipixel
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Saw in /r/Funny.

Dad: I changed the name of my ipod to titanic. Son: No dad.. Stop. Dad: I changed the name to Titanic, and its syncing. Son: Stop it. Dad: Its Titanic, and its Syncing.

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ib2nsfw
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2014
🚨︎ report
These were in an email forwarded to me from family. Bless their heart.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

Jokes about German sausages are the wurst.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

When chemists die, apparently they barium.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection you know urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pretty much pointless.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

I dropped out of the Communism class because of lousy Marx.

All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. As of now, it appears the police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro - what a rip off !

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Floofing_Warlock
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2015
🚨︎ report
Heard this at carols

What do you get when you cross an ipod and a Christmas tree?

Pineapple.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ravin66
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2013
🚨︎ report

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