Why did the security director for SDCC impose harsh penalties on heckler in the convention halls?

She had con-troll issues.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2017
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Apparently a town in South Wales is having greater lockdown restrictions imposed on it....

.....and it wouldn't have happened if people there had done things more Caerphilly.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ‘€︎ u/KCL80
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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My son stole some sandpaper

It wasn't a serious crime, so the judge imposed the medium fine, payable in due coarse.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/wcskjb
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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What's the similarity between pessimists and people with a phobia of sausages?

They both fear the wurst

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ‘€︎ u/TomG93
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2016
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Court Chester: Cell of the Century

Chester, the defendant, stood in front of the judge's imposing bench, waiting patiently for the reason why he was there. To further muddle the moment, he stared at items unfamiliar to him, at least in that context.

Perched on and near His Honor's desk were the following: A DuraLast Ultra in one car with a long, black cord stretching to another car, several alkaline D cells plugged into a black box, and lastly, a cell phone with its cord sticking into the wall.

Finally removing Chester's questioned look was his attorney leaning into his ear to whisper, "It's official, now: You're facing battery charges."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/bradstros
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
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My first dad joke way before I was an actual dad.

My friend started dating a new girl. I said, "What's her name? He replied "Tali. Kind of different."

I asked him, "How's it going?" He said that they had fun at first but she was getting clingy and he might have to break up with her.

I said, "Well, if she gets too crazy, we'll have to impose a... Tali-ban."

Real story.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ‘€︎ u/54Piscium
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2015
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