Did you hear of the architect who felt compelled to design overly-engineered buildings?

He had a complex complex complex.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
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I caught a fish this morning, felt compelled to throw him back

He looked shad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/U4gotmycheese
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
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I can't stop taking money out of every cash machine I walk past...

Doctor has diagnosed I'm suffering from withdrawal symptoms.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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Why did Jesus cross the road?

The power of Christ compelled him.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skryf
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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(Actual exchange) My wife was eating some day-old fries

I asked her, β€œDo those taste good??”

She replied, β€œNo, but the taste is...compelling.”

So I shouted β€œTHE POWER OF FRIES COMPELS YOU!!!”

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/I_tell_dad_jokes
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
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Okay, I just learned there's a scientific term for sneezing.

Autosomal-dominant Compelling Helio Ophthalmic Outburst.

In short, ACHOO.

i want my money back

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2018
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I just made my secretary audibly groan.

She came into my office with a box of highlighters for me and as a dad, I felt compelled to say "thanks, this will be the highlight of my day"

She sighed, groaned, and left, questioning her life choice to work here. :(

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToonaTheCat
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2017
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Fodder

In sitting with our real estate agent the other night, he mentioned "you're good fodder" for proposing us as buyers to the sellers of our (now) newly purchased home.

I responded with "I know I'm a good fodder, but don't forget about the good mudder sitting next to me!"

Wife's instant eye roll and very vocal "ughhh" was enough to compel me to leave this here...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubstylee43
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2016
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Studying genetics with my dad

Dad: "If your dad has brown eyes and your mom has blue eyes, what's the chance of you having brown eyes?"
Me: "75 percent"
Dad: "And what's the chance your eyes go opposite directions?"
Me: "I don't know..."
Dad: "One in four, because one blue east and one blue west!"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckets41
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2014
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