The wedding went off without a hitch.

The groom stormed off and all the guests started fighting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RootBoy42
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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I caught my son tying a half hitch on my new Rolex.

I thought β€˜knot on my watch’

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CYBERSson
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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The plan to move the pallets went off without a hitch. v.redd.it/br7lyin1qy531
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πŸ‘€︎ u/inDgenious
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
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Dad is taking a flight today so asked my mom if he got off without a hitch

β€œYes. The hitch was too heavy to bring along.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomBradyGoat1212
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
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I didn’t realize she was hitched...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/exref
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
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Is it a good or a bad thing if a wedding goes off without a hitch?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FezFernando
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
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Without anything to secure it, and unbeknownst to the driver, the trailer careened off the side of the road

It went off without a hitch

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeromocles
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
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From The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

β€œYou know,” said Arthur, β€œit’s at times like this, when I’m trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I’d listened to what my mother told me when I was young.” β€œWhy, what did she tell you?” β€œI don’t know, I didn’t listen.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/user120300
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
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What do you say to a one-legged hitch hiker?

Hop in!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amessersmith109
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2018
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[True Story] My son had a great day power boating - my wife asked if it all went off without a hitch...

I’m like, that’s nearly impossible!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tmoneynchange
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2018
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two antennas on top of the roof hitched and got married.

the ceremony was terrible. but the reception was great!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnhsun
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2017
🚨︎ report
I was pulling my trailer over a steep hill and just as I started going downhill the trailer passed me and crashed at the bottom of the hill.

I guess it went down without a hitch

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πŸ‘€︎ u/flippantteacup
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot. One summer they noticed a girl who was at the beach pretty much every day.

She wasn’t unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried, except for one thing. She would approach people who were sitting on the beach, glance around, then speak to them.

Generally, the people would respond negatively and she would wander off, but occasionally someone would nod and there would be a quick exchange of money for something she carried in her bag.

The couple assumed she was selling drugs and debated calling the cops, but since they didn’t know for sure they just continued to watch her.

After a couple of weeks the wife asked, β€œHoney, have you ever noticed that she only goes up to people with boom boxes and other electronic devices?”

He hadn’t and said so. Then she said, β€œTomorrow I want you to get a towel and our big radio and go lie out on the beach. Then we can find out what she’s really doing.”

Well, the plan went off without a hitch, and the wife was almost hopping up and down with anticipation when she saw the girl talk to her husband and then leave. The man walked up the beach and met his wife at the road. β€œWell, is she selling drugs?” she asked excitedly.”

β€œNo, she’s not.” he said, enjoying this probably more than he should have.

β€œWell, what is it, then?” his wife fairly shrieked.

The man grinned and said. β€œHer name is Sally and she’s selling batteries.”

β€œBatteries?” cried the wife.

β€œYes,” he replied. β€œShe sells C cells by the Seashore.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2020
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Did you hear about the 2 Tow Truck drivers who wanted to elope?

They got hitched.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/acherem13
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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True story

A friend was getting married in a small church. I was part of the wedding party, and we were at wedding practice, making sure everything went off without a hitch. We noticed the bride to be seemed a bit agitated, so we asked her what was wrong.

"The church is so small," she said, "which I love - but where will we fit the musicians? we hired three string musicians to play us in and out of the wedding and there doesn't seem to be any place for them to play!"

I looked at my friend and his bride-to-be and smiled.

"You have nothing to worry about. Haven't you heard...?" They shook their heads in unison.

"THERE'S ALWAYS ROOM FOR CELLO."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ranseler
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
My buddy got stood up at his wedding.

It went off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zombiem00se
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
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I once tried to haul a trailer with my car.

It all went off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theydeletedme
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
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Trailer Swift
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sealedbeak
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2017
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Did anyone see snake giving rides pic on r/interestingasfuck?

It's funny, because even though they were hitching a ride, the snake was the one getting toad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Godredd
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
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Just can’t say it reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JG_melon
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
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Czech Republic pun required!

I'm doing a hitch hiking face across Europe this winter. There are 60 teams and a prize for the best team name. The race finishes in Prague and I can't think of a name! Anyone got any ideas?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsStupendousMan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2016
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I was at a wedding last weekend which ended in disaster.

It went off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_roosh
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2018
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For some reason, I always have trouble renting trailers.

I can't seem to pull it off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tab7240
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2018
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How can you tell if a wedding is successful?

It doesn't go off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Warshok
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2017
🚨︎ report
Stolen from a friends Facebook post

OK... so did you ever notice how every time you spend 4 days alone in the woods and you make it out without a scratch or even a mosquito bite, and you're feeling all peaceful and relaxed and at one with the universe, you're not home 20 minutes and unloading the back of your truck when you slam your right shin into the trailer hitch... and amid the flashing white stars around you, your fists clench, your teeth grit, your body tenses and every "mean, nasty and ugly" word you ever read, heard, uttered or even imagined ("Wait... is #*&%#@!!! even a word??? Oh what the heck? It works!") goes tearing through your brain.... and eventually it passes and you keep working, surprised you're not even limping and it doesn't hurt more than it does... and almost an hour later, when you're finished and getting undressed to take your first hot shower in days, you see a lump on your shin the size of Rhode Island... and the first image that pops into your head is John Merrick yelling "I AM NOT AN ANIMAL!!!... in fact, it literally looks like a second knee on your right leg... so you spend the rest of the evening keeping it elevated and icing it on and off, alternating between a blue gel pack and a bag of frozen peas.... and when you go to bed, you keep the gel pack on while you read and then take it off before you go to sleep... and then you wake up around 3AM and decide to check your shin and the swelling has gone down quite a bit... but since you still have several hours before you get up, you decide to ice it again... but the gel pack on the floor is no longer cold so you get up, walk to the kitchen and open the fridge... and after taking a bite of leftover pizza from last night (because... well, you're here and what the heck?), you go into the freezer, grab the bag of frozen peas and take them back to bed with you... but they're all frozen into one big solid ball and well, that won't do... so you lay the bag on the bed to pound it once or twice to break them up, but instead the bag bursts open and suddenly there are frozen peas sprayed all over the bed and rolling onto the floor... and all those words from yesterday come rushing back into your head as you kneel to gather them all up... but suddenly your anger completely vanishes and you can't help laughing to yourself as you think, "gee, I can't remember the last time I pea'd the bed in the middle of the night"???

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Markwittz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2017
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my own dad. I don't think he's ever been more proud.

(Parents are moving from Missouri to Texas)

Dad: Your mom and I made it down here without a hitch! We're pretty wiped out, so we'll probably unpack the trailer in the morning.

Me: How'd you tow the trailer all the way down there without a hitch?!?!

Dad: Well played..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaddeusMuscles
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2015
🚨︎ report
I thought driving with a trailer would be hard,

But it came off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/th3cardman
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2016
🚨︎ report
A car salesman is trying to sell a truck

A car salesman is trying to sell a truck, and finally someone comes onto his lot looking for a large work truck. The saleman greets the man, and the man immediately explains his need. The salesman directs him over to the truck. The man begins looking over this truck, scrutinizing ever detail. Eventually he turns to the salesman and says "the truck looks fantastic. Because i need to tow a lot of heavy equipment, i will not be buying the truck". The saleman is floored. "But sir, the truck has a wonderful engine, big enough to haul some of the heaviest of trailers and loads!" The man replies "yes, but theres just one small hitch".

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2015
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Why was the redneck surprised to see that his trailer fell off his pickup?

It went off without a hitch.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/durhurr
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2017
🚨︎ report
So we pull into the gas station..

with an enclosed trailer on our hitch. Every other pump at this highway gas station was in use. Dad steps out of the car and before attending to the pump, walks up to the trailer and slaps the paneling several times (pound) (pound) (pound) "Hey! Be quiet in there!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZohnTangel
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2013
🚨︎ report
A couple was set to be married...

Unfortunately, an old lover was trying to break up the wedding. In the end, it went off without a hitch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/highvolt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2016
🚨︎ report
My in-laws brought us a used couch from out of state

They were gonna use a trailer but their hitch set-up didn't have the right electronics for the trailer lights. They ended up just bringing the couch in the bed of a friend's truck. When they arrived I got my father-in-law with, "Too bad the trailer rental didn't work out, but at least you pulled it off without a hitch." He gave me a groan and pity chuckle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Paul_Cinnabunyan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2015
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What did they say when the bride got jilted at the altar?

The wedding went off without a hitch!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/emiteal
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2015
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my co-worker today.

We were hooking a trailer up to our truck. The trailer is old and gives us a lot of grief. Since it was warmer out today it wasn't frozen to it was fairly easy to attach.

CW: "Well, that went off without a hitch!"

Me: "No there's a hitch, right there!" (as i pointed at the truck's hitch)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nightwing3
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2014
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Got

My step-dad and mom gifted me this metallic sun to hang outside my house; anyways he is always giving me 'house advice' some of which I admittedly don't take....

"Nice looking sun" I said "Yeah, this son listens, too" he exclaims without a hitch

Cool step-dad, I have.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EVRYEDGE
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2014
🚨︎ report

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