Did you hear the news about the guy who killed Tony the Tiger?
Did you hear the news about yardsticks?
They're not making them any longer.
Did you hear on the news about the truck full of Vick’s Vapor Rub that crashed?
There was no congestion for hours.
Did you hear the news about the man who died while sipping an earl grey?
Did you hear about the fish who wanted to be news anchor?
He went on air.. and he died.
Did you hear the news story that a toilet was stolen from a police station?
The police have nothing to go on
Did you hear the news about the inventor of the knock-knock joke?
Did you hear about what happened in the park the other day? The news is calling it a tragedy.
A peanut was just minding his own business
He was a salted
Did you hear the news about The Underground Railroad?
They were confronted by one of the officials and got arrested for blackmailing
Did you hear the news about the shovel? It's ground breaking. But the broom?
That really swept the nation.
Hey did you ever hear about the psychic that only gives you good news?
Did you hear the news about Patrick Mahomes?
His baby was 6 pounds sterling.
Not a bad price if you ask me!
Doctor: Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news?
Patient: Good news please.
Doctor: we're naming a disease after you.
Did you hear the news story about the man that was playing video games for 2 weeks straight?
Did you hear the story in the news about the man who planned to replace his head with a rabbits?
What a hare-brained scheme.
Did you hear the news about riptides?
Apparently, it's a current event.
Did you hear the news? FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
Did you hear the recent electrifying news about a drunken idiot who climbed a power pole and got the crap shocked out of him?
It's good to keep up on current events.
Did you hear about the news program dedicated to berries?
It was a currant affairs program.
Did you guys hear the news an ape opened a tanning salon in Bangkok I know heard he named it “A Range Of Tans”
Did you hear the news about that Chinese restaurant that got vandalized?
It was an act of wonton destruction.
Did you hear about the peanut that was in the news?
It turns out he was a-salted.
Did you guys hear the sad news about the Calzone business..?
Did you guys hear that story on the news about the little Russian doll who robbed the big Russian doll?
I heard it was an inside job
Did you hear about the vandals who destroyed the news studio?
I don't know how you could've missed it; it was breaking news.
Did you hear the news?
A psychic dwarf broke out of prison the police call went out there was a small medium at large
Did you hear the news about Thom Yolk...?
In time for Easter, Thom Yolk from Radioegg is just about to drop a new albumin.
Did you hear the good news about O.J.?
It is part of a complete breakfast
Did you hear the ex CEO of Fox news died?
Doctor: Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news?
Patient: Good news please.
Doctor: we're naming a disease after you.
Did you hear the news?
FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
Doctor: Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news?
Patient: Good news please.
Doctor: we're naming a disease after you.
Did you hear the news?
FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
Did you hear the news? FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
Did you hear the news about the shovel?
It's ground breaking.
But the broom?
That really swept the nation.
Did you hear the news?
FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
Did you hear the news? FedEx and UPS are merging.
They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
"My dad got me with this one: 'Did you hear the news? FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.'”
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