"You wait here, I’ll go on a head."
You go on ahead, I’ll just hang around for a bit.
I said go on a head
Slytherin.
Wet
I thought he was pulling my leg, but when I asked him, he told me "Yeah man it's true, no cap."
Computer: password cannot contain symbols
A metro-gnome
A slow cooker.
It really toque me by surprise!
Anyway, the sheriff burst in and arrested him for rustling.
He was cap-sized.
My dad worked in construction for most of his life, and because he worked with his hands, he sacrificed many watches. But if you don't have a watch, how are you to tell time? My dad has a great sense of humor and is always thinking of new ways to do things to make them more practical or thinking of ways to change things to make them work better for him. So after spending way too much money on a heavy duty watch that inevitably broke on him, he came up with a better solution.
He used the working part of a clock and stuck it on the inside rim of his hat, so if he wanted to know what the time was, he just had to look up. Simple. And the way his hat was, you couldn't see the clock when looking at him unless you were underneath him and looking up.
And then came the funny part. Every time he was asked what time it was, he would look up at the sun, scan the horizon, pretend to do a math equation in his head, and tell them the exact time down to the minute. I've witnessed him doing this a few times but never gave it away. The look of surprise and confusion this gave people was priceless.
My dad had done other funny things like this, but this was by far the funniest.
I’m brimming with disdain for you
It’s a little gnome fact
I’m not afraid to brave the elements.
A maSeuss.
He had a bounty on his head.
..hope I pull it off.
You flip it over and it becomes capsized.
One. It's a trick question.
One more piece of clothing and I’ll be one whole Roy!
It becomes a Haudi
You pick up those two and I'll go on ahead later.
So the audience can't see their hare!!!
I guess you could say it was in caps lock.
Because it had its CAPS LOCK on.
Edit- North of 4k upvotes, Thank You Kind Strangers.
It gets wet
What if I make a spelling mistake?
I said, "Not off the top of my head. Ba dum tss"
You stay here. I’ll go on a head.
You stay here, I’ll go on ahead
You stay here, I’ll go on a head.
I said go on ahead
You stay here, I’ll go on ahead.
You hang around here, I’ll go on ahead.
You stay here. I'll go on a head.
Wet
