19 Hilarious Guillotine Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

I've landed my dream job at the guillotine factory...

Will beheading there tomorrow.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD

📅︎ Dec 31 2020

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I just got a new job as a guillotine operator....

Beheading there shortly.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD

📅︎ Nov 13 2020

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I finally got a job at the guillotine factory.

I'll beheaded there soon.

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👤︎ u/wmd1234

📅︎ Dec 30 2020

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I finally got my dream job at the guillotine factory

I’ll beheading there shortly

Edit: Thanks for the silver. My first ever award!

👍︎ 14k

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👤︎ u/jk72788

📅︎ Jun 16 2020

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The Guillotine was supposed to be ahead of its time

It had cutting edge technology

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👤︎ u/batmans_apprentice

📅︎ Nov 15 2020

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My friend got sentenced to the guillotine

He couldn't face death head on

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👤︎ u/endommagejosue

📅︎ Nov 19 2020

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Many French guillotine victims had their heads

[Removed]

👍︎ 11k

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👤︎ u/bishslap

📅︎ Dec 11 2019

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I bought 20 guillotines because there was a great deal

I don’t know why I thought it’d be a good idea. I lost my head when buying them

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👤︎ u/TheCultofLoss

📅︎ Jun 02 2020

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I just employed someone at my guillotine factory...

He seemed so happy to be working with cutting head technology.

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👤︎ u/SteveOMatt

📅︎ Jun 16 2020

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In France, when the honey bee revolution began they broke out a tiny little guillotine for the Queen...but she laughed in their faces.

No matter how much they tried, the guillotine wouldn't work. When the chief executioner examined the situation it was clear why, she had already been "bee-headed"

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👤︎ u/ridik_ulass

📅︎ Apr 18 2020

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People didn't take too kindly to the invention of the guillotine.

In-fact, heads were rolling.

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👤︎ u/MrHollowed

📅︎ Dec 12 2019

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I got sacked from my job at the guillotine factory today

Its a cut-throat business

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👤︎ u/ccooddee

📅︎ Nov 26 2019

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Did I ever tell you about the time I went to see a real guillotine?

But wait, I’m getting a head of myself.

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👤︎ u/TastefulDrapes

📅︎ Jun 01 2019

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I knew a guy who got executed via guillotine

He really lost his mind.

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👤︎ u/lunalaxthegod

📅︎ May 18 2019

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Did you hear about the French executioner who left his breakfast on the guillotine?

It was a pain in the neck.

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👤︎ u/BagelJaengi

📅︎ Sep 20 2018

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Getting Into A Guillotine Backwards Is The True Meaning Of The Agony Of Defeet

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👤︎ u/scarydrew

📅︎ Feb 21 2017

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I got a job at the guillotine factory.

I'll beheading there shortly.

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👤︎ u/sarcasticpremed

📅︎ Oct 21 2020

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Got a new job at the guillotine factory.

I'll beheading there shortly.

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👤︎ u/AustralianGroan

📅︎ Mar 23 2020

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I got a new job at the guillotine factory

I'll be heading there shortly

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👤︎ u/HellsJuggernaut

📅︎ Apr 07 2020

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