I finally got my dream job at the guillotine factory

I’ll beheading there shortly

Edit: Thanks for the silver. My first ever award!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jk72788
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
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Many French guillotine victims had their heads

[Removed]

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bishslap
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
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Not sure if this fits the mold, but I am a dad and I like it...

So 3 explorers were captured by the king of a pacific island. One explorer was from Paris, one was from London, and one was from New York. The island king told them that they were all going to be killed, and that their skins would be used to make canoes. The king gave them a choice as to how they would die.

The explorer from Paris chose to be killed by a guillotine, and they cut off his head.

The explorer from London chose to be killed by a gun, and they shot him in the head.

The explorer from New York chose to be killed by a fork. The island kind was confused. He didn't know what to do with the fork, so he gave it to the explorer from New York. The guy immediately starts stabbing himself all over with the fork. There is blood everywhere and it's a horrific scene. The dismayed island king asks the explorer from New York what the hell he's doing, and the New Yorker replies...

FUCK YOU AND YOUR GOD-DAMN CANOE.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nimble2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2017
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Touring the "medieval torture and execution" section of an old European castle, when I dropped this one...

"The guillotine truly was cutting-edge technology at the time."

A dad within earshot said he appreciated my sharp wit.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shadowthunder
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2015
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