Godfather Puns

He told me he was Sirius.

An offer you can't understand.

He made me an offer I couldn’t understand.

A Coppola 'em.

All hits, all the time.

One is all about dinero, the other one about De Niro.

My buddy and I brought in pizza from Godfather's Pizza this past weekend. We walked into his cluttered studio apartment with the pizza and some beers and I looked around for a place to put the pie.

His kitchen table had no room; neither did his coffee table. When I asked him where I should put it he told me just to set it down on top of his bed while we made space.

"Are you sure you want me to put it there?" I asked.

"Yeah, what's the big deal?"

"You want me to put the pizza on this - the duvet of my daughter's bedding?"

I could hear Brando groaning from beyond the grave.

Papa Dom

Francis Ford made a Coppola great movies..

So occasionally the theatres around my area will do a film series showing older films in the theatres format. This time around they’re doing Mafia films.

My dad is 62 and is slowly staring to see his cognitive strength dwindle, but there’s one ability he’ll never lose...

His ability to land a great dad joke

At the end of the evening, after dinner with my parents and godparents. My Godfather gets up to leave, puts on his jacket and turns to us. Out of the blue he comes out with:

>I'll leave you with this: You can kiss a nun once. You can kiss a nun twice. But you must never get into the Habit.

We laugh, groan, laugh some more. He leaves.

It's a little room where I can sit and watch movies like The Godfather and Apocalypse Now.
It's a Francis Ford Cupola.

It’s true! His dad was the Godfather.

Bellatrix: "I killed your godfather!"

Harry: "Are you serious?!?"

Bellatrix: "Dead Sirius."

We're watching tv. All of sudden I hear some slapping, my godmother laugh and tell my godfather, "you're so weird". I turn and he says: "you wanted your palm read, so I made it red!"

Laughter.

Then my god mother looks at me and says "why does this remind you of pie" (sticking her hand out) I go, "idk, why" She replies: "Bc its got meringue on it!"

I love them.

Me talking to my godfather: " [...] one of these Teutonic metal bands like Saxon [...]" 19 year old godsister: "What's Teutonic metal? Is it like two different tones at once?"

At Thanksgiving dinner with some family friends and my dad (a dentist) and his dental partner (my godfather) are talking about movies.

Godfather: Have you guys seen Gravity yet?

Dad: No, I heard it's heavy.

cue laughter

I would be listening to Dookie by Green Day

"Hey son, what are you listening to? BLUE SKY?!"

A godfather.