Tried putting in a new glass window yesterday
Why did Hitler wear eye glasses?
Because without them he could Nazi.
Why do Python developers wear glasses?
Glass eye making is endangered job.
There are not enough pupils.
To whoever stole my glasses
I will find you, I have contacts.
Will glass coffins ever be popular?
A man and his son go to the optometrist and both have the same prescription but can't afford two sets of glasses.
His solution? "I wear my son's glasses at night..."
Why did the potato have to keep buying new lenses for his glasses?
His eyes wouldn't stop growing.
Glass Coffins
Will they be popular?
Remains to be seen
Why did the pun master order a glass coffin for his own funeral?
Because he wanted his friends to see what he dead there.
I had a glass statue of Captain Kirk. My dog ran by and knocked it over and it broke.
Why is wearing glasses during math classes important?
My earliest clear memory from my childhood is going with my dad to get my prescription glasses.
Life before that is a blur.
My grandfather turned 90 today, but he still doesn’t need glasses.
He drinks straight from the bottle.
Why did the aspiring programmer buy a pair of glasses?
Glasses make driving safer..
Provided that they're worn instead of emptied.
Why should you always wear glasses when doing Math?
A long time bachelor met a girl in a bar with a glass eye.
As she sat down next to him her glass eye fell to the floor next to his stoll. He picked it up and handed it back to her.
They chatted all night and hit it off pretty well and eventually started dating.
One day while lying in bed, he turns to her and asks:
"Why me? Out of all the guys that were at the bar that night, why did you choose me?"
She looked at him surprised and said:
"Well, you caught my eye."
Why did the mortician need glasses?
Why did the man put his glasses in a can of beans?
My bedroom now has a stained glass window.
A pigeon just flew right into it.
As kids, dad used to take his glass of milk and wave it across our face before taking a sip because...
He likes his milk "past-your-eyes"
If you wear glasses and have been required to wear a mask during the COVID pandemic, you may be entitled to condensation.
My wife: I just got this new pair of glasses. How do I look?
Me: As always, I recommend using your eyes.
What's the happiest type of glass?
When I met my childhood bully last Friday, I was happy to learn he had double vision, because he always bullied me with my glasses. But then...
There's a big scratch on the inside of my glasses...
I was out shopping and dropped my glass of pickles
I called for the janitor and told him it was kind of a big dill
I proudly exclaimed to my family, "As a wizard, I enjoy turning objects into glass!"
"I just wanted to make that clear!"
My donkey keeps eating the glass out of my window.
It’s a real pane in the ass.
Why did the pricipal from the Simpsons get glasses...?
What did the friend say after his brother asked what will happen after he gets his glasses?
What did my daughter say when she put on her Frozen glasses?
I accidentally sat on glass and the shattered glass went in my butt.
It was a real pane in the ass.
What do you call some who steals a glass of juice on a cruise?
Why did the milk glasses listen to the milk carton?
Because the carton was a litre.
We're going to buy some glasses
What do you call a talking cow wearing pants and glasses?
Dave.
*joke from my 10 year old
Warning...."To the person who stole my glasses....."
"I'll find you....I have contacts."
Will glass coffins ever be popular?
Will glass coffins become popular?
Do you think glass coffins will ever be a thing?
Will glass coffins ever become popular?
Will glass coffins ever become popular?
Will glass coffins be a success?
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