If Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII was involved with politics, he’d be a republican.

He’s all right wing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ActuallyNTiX
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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The final potatoes
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SushiWithoutSushi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
There are two possibilities for words that mean "final part" or "smaller amount".

The possibilities are: end, less.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanooooo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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What did Jesus the Interior Decorator say in his final moments?

It is furnished.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/faberj92
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
The origami semi-finals are airing soon.

You can watch it on Paperview

πŸ‘︎ 73
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Real_Normal
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
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Did you hear the one about the Mexican Magician? He announced to his audience: "For my final illusion, I will make myself vanish on the count of three…"

"… UNO! DOS!" *POOF* And he vanished without a Tres.

πŸ‘︎ 288
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
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I was on a game show and the final question was "What do you call a 3D painting made out of plaster?" I couldn't think of the answer and I was worried I'd lose all of the money. Then I got it right!

It was a relief

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/No_Gray_Area
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
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A man takes his seat at a football world cup final. He looks to his left and notices that there is a spare seat between himself and the next guy.

MAN: "Who would ever miss the world cup final?"

GUY: "That was my wifes seat. We have been to the last five world cup finals together, but sadly she passed away."

MAN: "That's terrible, but couldn't you have brought another family member, friend or someone else with you?"

GUY: "No...They are all at her Funeral!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ball5deeper
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
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Van Gogh's final resting state was in...

Asymmetry

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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Genie: What is your final wish? Boy: I wish I were you.

Genue: weurd but alrught.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
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My sarcastic teacher handed back my final exam..

I was told I was intelligen’t

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CakeRedditor
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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A Spanish magician prepares the audience for his final trick...

He yells "UNO!"

The crowd falls silent in anticipation.

"DOS!"

Everyone's eyes are wide, laser focused on the preformer.

Then, the magician vanishes... without a tres.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChewyNutCluster
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
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Today I learned I will assume my final form and will he becoming a dad in December.

Probably name my kid Luke so I can remind him who I am for the rest of eternity.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/macbeezy_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
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I've never lost a World Series finals.

Never lost a boxing match against Muhammed Ali either. Also never lost a single game in the NBA Finale.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/julesvdz
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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For my English final, I had to compose a lyric poem marked by exaltation of feeling and style, varying length of line, and complexity of stanza forms.

"Ode no!" I thought.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I happily hummed as I attached the final arm to my dead girlfriends torso...

I made Mary!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
The final four letters in the word β€œqueue” aren’t silent...

They’re just waiting their turn...

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Final fantasy dad jokes 101:

Gladio: dog sure can track a scent

Ignis: certainly nose how to find us

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_M_LUMBER
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you see the final episode of that new Netflix series about the dude who couldn't stop buying himself gifts!?

Spoiler alert

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedPlanetCorridor
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2020
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The headline writer for this article had waited years for this moment. Though it is rumoured his final idea came to him on the tube... bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england…
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2020
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I was at a concert of which a Scandinavian woman was playing on stage, one of my friends turns to me and remarks β€œI wonder if she’s from Sweden” another friend says β€œmaybe Norway?” My final friend asks β€œdo you thinks she’s Finnish?”

I boastfully reply β€œI fucking hope not she’s only been on five minutes”

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr-Suggs
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
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Trump has just issued Boris Johnson a final warning about allowing Chinese technology in their phone system

He told him "it's my way or the Huawei"

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emu404
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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Why did Rudolph get in trouble for his final report card marks?

He went down in History.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thenameislogan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2019
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[OC] The Final, Most Essential Command
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ADAlverde
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
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The Final Frontier is damper than I expected.
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/squab4dinner
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
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The teacher called me out in front of the whole class for cheating on the final and took away my A+.

It was degrading.

πŸ‘︎ 88
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πŸ‘€︎ u/radsman
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2019
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So I hear they're coming out with another sequel to Undertale, but this time, the final boss is an extinct giant shark.

His boss battle theme will be called Megalodonia.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brisingr2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
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Hhahahahaha this was on my final i am funny
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobtomzoe69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the dying spice merchant say to his final customer?

I'm all out of thyme!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DankyyKangg
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Everytime I open a bag of M&Ms it's like the final question in a round of Mastermind...

.... I've started, so I'll finish.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/queen_zombie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I just took off my backpack after my very last college final.

Boy, was that a weight off my shoulders.

Edit: I actually am finally about to graduate, so I’m happy even if you don’t like my joke!

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zachpledger
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm in the Masterchef Final

The steaks have never been higher

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hdeifh
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
I got another letter from a lawyer today that read final notice!

I'm glad he won't be bothering me anymore!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/B-man44
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My Great Uncle's Final Words

My great uncle just passed on Sunday. The family had known for a few days it was near the end. His family gathered around him on his death bed, with some flying in from other states to say their goodbyes.

"Dad," says his daughter, "[Grandson] flew in from San Francisco just to see you."

My great uncle woke up for moment and said, "Boy, his arms must be tired."

Those were his last words.

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_Composer
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the final round of the Artist Competition?

It was a draw.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thedeafbadger
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2019
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A respiratory therapist is on his death bed and his wife asks him what his final wishes were...

He replies, "I want to be cremated, there will be no coffin at my funeral"

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kevingcp
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
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I made it to the final round of the Art Competition, but didn’t win.

It turned out to be a draw.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thedeafbadger
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the death row prisoner request as his final meal?

Lifesavers

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bdub_7
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
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For my final exam in piloting school, they had me fly a shipment of paint to its destination.

I passed with flying colors.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Figured you guys might enjoy my final Inktober drawing!
πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vvarx
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2018
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After all the final season backlash, how did D&D get off the Game of Thrones highway?

They took Daenerys exit..

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/changhaobyu
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Every year on New Year's Eve, when everyone's counting down the final 10 seconds to ring in the new year, I get up off the couch and stand up. I stand up and raise my left leg and just leave it raised for a little while until the countdown finishes and midnight strikes

that way I always start the new year off on the right foot

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
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I submitted 10 puns to a joke writing competition to see if any of them made to the finals.

Sadly, no pun in ten did.

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2018
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Genie: What is your final wish? Boy: I wish I were you.

Genue: weurd but alrught.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
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Genie: What is your final wish?

Boy: I wish I were you.

Genue: weurd but alrught.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/khanglikestowin
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
🚨︎ report

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