I wrote a book about how convicted felons can use fiction writing to work through their experiences and achieve better rehabilitation outcomes.

It's called, "Prose and Cons".

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ‘€︎ u/arrenlex
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't beggers be allowed in court for selection to the Jury box like any other non felon citizen?

Cuz, beggers can't be choosers!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/imgprojts
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a snobbish felon walking down the stairs?

A condescending con descending

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/yazziey
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a convicted felon who just jumped from an airplane?


πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/PapaSprocket
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2018
🚨︎ report
Did anyone else hear about that arrogant felon that jumped to his death?

For a few moments, he was a descending condescending con.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jofax88
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2017
🚨︎ report
i have just been swooned by a man only to discover he’s a career criminal

i guess you could say i felon love

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ‘€︎ u/____okay
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I saw a fruit running from the police recently

It was a water felon

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ‘€︎ u/Escalade1414
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
How did that guy end up at the bottom of the well in prison?

He felon

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/CoastalCon
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the gang that was shoplifting melons?

I heard they’re all convicted felons.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ‘€︎ u/stor_e_teller
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
New TV Show Puns

I put up Punderdome cards on my door every day. Today's cards were too much fun not to share. What else can you come up with?


Project Run-a-way

America's Next Top Money Launderer

Keeping Up with the Car-Jackings

Naked & Public Exposure

My Solitary Confinement Life

The Real House-arrest Wives

The Great British Breaking & Entering

So You Think You Can Drink & Drive?

America's Got Theft

Pawn(ing Stolen Goods) Stars

Jersey Shore You Should Steal That Car

Who Wants to be an Arrested Felon?

Say Yes to the Drugs

Arson Daily

What else do can you think of?!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/Leash15
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Pearl Harbor of puns

If your onion sang hip-hop, would that be a rapscallion?

I used to be an astronaut, but I got tired of eating out of satellite dishes. I wasn't allowed to eat the Milky Way, even though I had to look at it every day. The worst thing was, I never got to visit The Space Bar. Then, when I was visiting the dark side of the moon, I was bitten by a parasite. Now, you might think it's crazy, but the doctor who removed it called it a lunar-tick.

If "womb" is pronounced "woom" and "tomb" is pronounced "toom", shouldn't "bomb" be pronounced "boom"?

China recently tested a new steroid. It basically turns you into The Hulk. The side effect is it could turn you into a crazed zombie that tends to rip the upper extremities from people. People are saying that this could be the zombie apocalypse. In my opinion, lips have nothing to do with it. I call it ARMageddon. The only way to stay safe now is to not let anyone close enough to disarm you.

I recently was going to join the railroad union. I decided against it because it's complicated. If I received instruction on driving the locomotive, would they call it engineering, or training?

I got a sad story about a flower. I don't know who the heck she pissed off, but damn, now she's a Black-Eyed Susan.

I finally figured out what makes leaves angry. Fall. They get so mad they change color. Some are yellow. They're just afraid and run from their problems. The other ones usually just leave.

I went parachuting with my military buddies once. We landed on a department store. I told him I think we're at the wrong coordinates. He said: "Nope. We're right on Target"

I asked a psychologist if Native Americans have strong emotions. He said "Oh yeah, they're intense".

If a psychotic person thought something made sense, would that thought be psychological?

If Matt Damon were searching for a secondhand store, would he be Goodwill Hunting?

My friend is a Marksman for the military. One day, he went to the armory and asked for 3 snipers. They gave him a candy bar. It was a 3 Musketeers.

I want to be there if Dwayne Johnson ever uses a pizza stone. That way I can smell what "The Rock" is cookin'.

Christopher bought a lemon, and the car broke down. Now Christopher Walken.

Have you heard about the latest bank battle on Wall Street? Capital One and Chase got in a fight and Capital One.

You know what a pirate says to his wenches when he sees the shoreline? "LAND HO!"

A man finds a lamp in the desert and dusts it off. Poof! A genie p

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ‘€︎ u/PraetorSolaris
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a thief that's struggling with depression, and some gum trees getting chopped down by a cat with a chainsaw?

One's a felon feeling glum, and the other is a feline felling glum

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ‘€︎ u/deepBlueCheese
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Elon Musk dad jokes

What do you call Elon Musk if he commits fraud?

Felon Musk

What do you call Elon Musk if he is a lizard person?

Elon Musk

What do you call Elon Musk if he is a furry?

Elon Husky

What do you call Elon Musk if it is past 6:30?

Elon Dusk

What do you call Elon Musk if he is a cantaloupe?

Melon Musk

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/muskeyelon
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call the CEO of Space X in jail?

Felon Musk

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ‘€︎ u/5kgofwater
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2017
🚨︎ report
You guys hear about the two inmates who grew quite fond of each other?

It was just two cell mates who felon love

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePootKnocker
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2017
🚨︎ report
Why can't you trust zebras?

Because they're convicted horse felons.

Ask me what they're convicted of... ...


My fiance said this joke the other day. It's so bad you can't help but laugh.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/AwesomeIncarnate
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you call a criminal talk show host?

Jimmy Felon.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/Terminaguy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2015
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.