Experiments Puns

Because Curiosity killed the cat.

One of them protested, but he was just being a B rat.

then your curiosity killed the cat.

Alas, I've no spring chicken!

I stayed up all night and I didn't snore once.

If they sank, girl ant. If they floated, buoyant.

Because the scientists needed a test tickle to start.

The lab clerk says “I thought you wanted a beakers dozen!”

It was a Toto failure.

But I just haven't got thyme

Shrödingers Kim Jong Un

“Honey, can you hear me!?” She turned around and shouted, “For the third time, yes I can hear you!”

Me: Yes, but I was in the control group.

I was a Chemistry major.

NASA decided to send a vegetable to space. After the rough takeoff the spud soiled himself.

Operation Spud-Nik turned violent when the astronauts, due to unforeseen circumstances, ran out of food. It wasn't long before the five guys came up with a plan. They unearthed him and gouged his eyes out. As unappealing as it sounded, spud was sliced up, fried and eaten. Noone seemed to mind a little assault. Sometimes spaceflight is unpredictable and dirty sacrifices must be made.

Unfortunately, they didn't go anywhere.

In his LABRADORy

There was a fly buzzing around my laboratory, so I decided to do an experiment. After 10 minutes, I was able to catch it. I set it on the table and said "Fly, fly". The fly flew away immediately after I released it. After another 10 minutes, I was able to catch it again. This time, I took a pair of tweezers and removed its wings. I said "fly, fly", but this time it didn't do anything once released. I was able to determine one thing: when you remove the wings from a fly, it becomes deaf.

Now all his hopes Argon

It's a lab assistant.

Seems like there's some chemistry happening between them.

It's my dream job.

...but I don't know how to brooch the subject.

A tare-orist.

He didn't want to let the cat out of the bag.

Love is blind, but it has a great sense of smell.

Once, there was a young woman who wanted to do a little psychological experiment. So she carefully bred cherry trees to bloom in multiple colors, and arranged to have them planted such that the trees of one color would spell out the name of some other color. You know, to test the Stroop effect.

However, the instructions (which were, admittedly, odd) weren't transmitted to the workers (all starving underpaid grad students) effectively, so the groups of various colored cherry trees were planted such that the colors matched the names, completely invalidating her experiment.

She's now the Stroop drupe group blooper girl, Stroop drupe blooper girl, Stroop drupe blooper girl...

She now focuses on Anglo-Saxon royalty.

I teach Physics. One of my students pointed out to me that I nod my head a lot as I'm talking with students one on one or in small groups. When we get to waves, I'm going to ask them to count the number of times I nod my head in one class. Then they can calculate the frequency at which I nod my head, or in other words, how much my head Hertz.

She used to walk around town in her lab coat

Chemistry.

He liked to wok on the wild side.

Their methods were quite shocking