He got fired.
There was a cardiac arrest
The bartender says, “Hey! Aren’t you the rope that I just threw out?”
The rope replied, “No. I’m a frayed knot.”
It was hoppenstance
St Peter says to the nuns "Given you are nuns and have devoted your life to good works you only need to answer a single question each to enter Heaven."
He looks to the first nun and asks "where did the first woman live?"
The first nun quickly replied "the garden of Eden".
St Peter nods approval and looks to the second nun "what was the name of the first woman?"
The second nun pauses for a second and then replies "Eve."
"Well done!" Says St Peter before turning to the third nun and saying "As the Mother Superior you should be able to answer this; what did Eve say to Adam when she first saw him?"
The Mother Superior furrows her brow and says "oh, that's a hard one".
"Correct!" Says St Peter. "You may enter."
That's just my two cents.
"a lone mask" wants to know !
Because i am running to the finnish line.
It's about thyme.
Maybe I'm not planting them deep enough.
He felon
It’s the only one that’s always on sail....
Polygon
The writing is on the wall
Either it goes to waste or it goes to waist
After we finished installing the hooks, and hung the curtains I asked her to hand the cap to me.
"Honey, can you hand me the pole end?"
She was unsure of what I meant, and asked, "What pole end?"
"Pole end is a country in eastern Europe, but I need you to hand me the cap the to the curtain rod."
Groaning ensues...
Now she's grounded.
Carrying all that water around is heavy!
He kept using the carpool tunnel!
It got Framed
With shear determination
The cue was too long
Because when I try to chop up fresh ones, I usually run out of thyme!
I saw myself doing it.
He was careless with his Whisper
Onion-tended Consequence
It's a vicious cycle.
I know it's just a phase.
