But that’s just my two scents.
But I guess he didn’t get my incentives.
Tell them to "log on."
"Cedar, that's what I'm talking about. Its not oak-ee doke to take credit for what wood be my joke. Every bodhi has to create their own." I told her. Didn't mean to chop her down like that in hindsight. I hope she still pines after me.
We're in a poly-hammerous relationship
Pear Pressure
All thanks to a strong local motive.
Me, trailing from a conversion in progress: "... Sounds like the holocaust"(Said Hole-ih-cost in my accent)
Her: "Holy-caust?"
Me: "Holy-cost. How much does being holy cost?"
Her: "Six million Jews."
My mother freaks out whenever she hears him say that because she hates it and she's sick of it. I think it's hilarious.
Hey guys! I need combinations of words for ass and words that mean something in the realm of “making someone happy”
Context: a friend of mine and I send each other selfies on the toilet and she’s having a shitty day (hah) so I bent over the toilet and stuck my ass in the air and took a picture like my ass was taking a selfie and now I need something punny yet encouraging to say
A few years ago, we started a show that I quite frankly never thought would work.
Nearly four years later, including two sold out appearances at San Francisco Sketchfest and a local TV featurette, our show "Capitol PUNishment" is now streaming on Twitch Friday night at 8:30pm PST.
I hope it's ok to post this in here. If not, feel free to remove with no hard feelings. Just encouraging pun lovers to check out what is best described as "a fast-paced, in-the-moment spectacle that combines everything you love about gameshows, rap-battles, and "dad" jokes, into a unique and hilarious competitive format."
Our channel is twitch.tv/capitolpuns
Here's a little video to help paint the picture: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2RE9PgmfXo
I thought this was so great that I made matching labels for the Tapth and the Thoap.
“You ghost girl!”
Thanks to her, I’m graduating from Sky diving school.
Every where he drove it, people shouted "Look at that S-Car go!"
But they encouraged me to immediately return to the vaccination center to pick up my glasses.
Ewe do ewe.
They really lifted my spirits.
I look up, straight faced, and calmly reply, "yeah, we don't talk about that.."
My wife buried her face for a good minute.. I'm proud of that one.
EDIT: I showed my wife how many ppl thought this was funny and she told me to say "please don't encourage him" .. :)
He was so encouraging, he assured me that he has my back.
The other six are the Zeroes.
"Whisper it some words of encouragement!"
In Baseball, hit and runs are encouraged!
Dad(singing):
You can do it
You can do it
You can pick your nose and chew it
(repeat for effect)
Their marriage was on the rocks!
(Thank you u/VadJag for encouraging me to post this again!)
If he's smart, I can tell my friends that Violence solves problems.
A speedboat
[Disclaimer]: I don’t encourage the use of drugs
She really encouraged us to make a difference.
I thought this was so great that I made matching labels for the Tapth and the Thoap.
Thanks to him, I’m soon graduating from the Sky Diving school.
