Empire Strikes Back Puns

...Yoda originally spent part of his exile as a shepherd.

All the sheep, Dagobah.

The scene is playing where Luke is hanging upside down and just managed to defeat the beast on Hoth by cutting off its arm.

Dad: Well you know why they call it a Wampa now.

Me: Why?

Dad: Because it only has one-paw.

Me: Uses Force Groan

Dad: "I never got why they call it Hoth. Shouldn't it be Coldth?"

Me: "... I can't watch movies with you anymore."

If you go to New York and punch the Empire State Building, then according to Newton's third law of dynamics...

The Empire strikes back

So, my sister is having her final tests on high school (I'm in college and have a really cute son with my girlfried) and got home today with a weird look on her eyes. Me and dad were having some sandwiches and watching The Empire Strikes Back (Star Wars marathon hype!). I looked at her and asked what happened, she immediately responded "I'm tired as fuck." By that point, I looked at my dad. He was looking at me, with a sparkle on his eyes. We both stood up, walked to her and said together: "HELLO TIRED AS FUCK, WE ARE DAD" Even my mother started laughing. It was hillarious.

And we get to the "Empire" apples. When we get there, my dad says, "We better be careful when we pick these apples" I said, "Why". He replies, " Because the Empire strikes back." A few minutes later he throws an apple at me and yells, "The Empire strikes back!"