They should.
It'll be a real Page-turner!
He is truly a self made man
She is the complete inverse of my e^(x).
Degeneres woman donated 1 million dollars to an organisation building schools in Africa
I guess she's Ellen De-genre-es now.
Ellen Book.
Elle-Vader music
My brother is a great dad, but he tells this joke every time I see him
...it had a certain Juno se qua
Dad-"Of course she's an actress. They're all thespians!"
Me: "Since its Fathers Day, I get to do whatever I want!"
5 Year Old: "Me too!"
"It doesn't work like that."
"Sure it does! It's son-day!"
Awww nuts.
Edit: 2500! Thanks guys! And on my cake day too.
People are saying it is a little mistake, I think it's is a Grande.
As a new(ish) dad I feel it's my duty to really bring all the dad jokes to the yard. Lately it's been coming a bit more naturally.
The Girlfriend and I were sitting on the couch and she was talking about how much she loved all the prizes and gifts that Ellen is always giving out on her show.
My response: "I heard she is going to stop giving things away, so she's changing her name to Ellen Deselfish."
I only have myshelf to blame.
My husband and I sat down on one of the sofas and the sales guy said "You know, this is an Ellen DeGeneres." I looked at him, at bit puzzled, and said "I dunno, it looks more like a couch to me."
That was nice of Ellen to bring out those pizzas. I've always thought she was very Degeneres.
"They just found an early draft to the film Alien.
Ash: I can't find the milk, Ellen.
Ripley: In space no-one can. Here, use cream."
Classic midnight text from dad.
