“Well that’s not a good sign” she said
And a table... And a stool...
Me-Dad: “Nope never seen her either”.
But it was at its peak in the 80s.
Stolen and butchered from https://xkcd.com/2308: Title text was “It's a good mountain but it really peaked in the 80s.”
She hasn’t
It was Heaven-scent
...because you shouldn't put metric prefixes on Troy units.
...neither did she
Cause she’s dead
I mean I would too if my name was “hnuuugh”
If you want credit go to Helen Waite
Helen Killer
Would we say she had a fourth sense about things?
When they handed her a basketball, she kept trying to read it.
They put a plunger in the toilet.
Neither did she.
She was never Permitted.
Helen Killer
(Technically I haven't heard any joke before, but...)
I was telling my dad about tactile sign, which is what deafblind people use to communicate. It is like signing condensed ASL with someone's hands on yours, and it is what I plan on specializing in when I am a Certified Deaf Interpreter. He brought up Helen Keller and the conversation went as follows.
Dad: "But how many people can really do that? How many people could really communicate with Helen Keller?"
Me: "Well-"
Dad: "PROBABLY JUST A HANDFUL!"
I'm borderline convinced he deafened me as an infant in hopes that someday the set up for this joke would present itself.
Coworker A: “... then I was at the Helen Keller Institute.” Me: “The Helen Keller Institute? I’ve never seen or heard of it.” Coworker B: “That was horrible.” Me: “but necessary”
You could say their love life at the moment is truley a nightmare before christmas
No need to Helen, I don’t need a whole case of them. One dilla is plenty.
'You look like Helen Brown!'
'Well, you look like shit and blue'
After a day at the air show with out a nap. Me, "Are you tired." Her, "No, I Helen."
Cause you're on Helen Parr
While out walking with the family we saw a bench with a dedication plaque. It read "In Memory of Helen, she walked these meadows with joy". Of course I had no choice but to remark "Why didn't Joy get a bench too?"
Cue involuntary snort of laughter from the wife. Mission accomplished.
then a table, then a chair
Neither did she.
Neither did she.
Because she’s dead
Neither did she
