I was so bored sitting at home that I memorized six pages of the dictionary.

I learned next to nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 970
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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I ran into my friend Mark who stole my dictionary.

I said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
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I swallowed a dictionary today.

It gave me thesaurus throat I've ever had.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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I just bought a dictionary today and bought it home to find out that all the pages were blank.

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
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I looked up the word 'opaque' in the dictionary...

....but the definition is unclear.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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The author of Webster's dictionary committed suicide with the book he wrote.

At least he died on his own terms.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BinaryPeach
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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What do you call a dictionary on drugs?

High definition.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
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I remember the first time I used a dictionary...

It was a defining moment in my life.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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I accidentally ripped a page off my dictionary

After re-checking it, I found out that little to nothing was missing.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tuvalve
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
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I decided to read my dictionary in bed last night, but I didn't finish it.

I got up to P.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
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I came home to find out that one of my kids tore both the front and the back pages of our dictionary.

Things just went from bad to worse.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
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What's the longest word in the dictionary?

Smiles. Because there is a mile between the S's.

Have to give credit to my ten year old daughter for this one... Apparently I'm bringing her up right.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RageMonster17
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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I ate a dictionary yesterday

This is thesaurus throat I’ve ever had! I don’t know if this has been posted before or not.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OttoTheGeezer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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My mom bought me a cheap dictionary for my birthday.

I couldn't find the words to thank her.

πŸ‘︎ 144
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlankPhotos
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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Y'all just made it into the Merriam-Webster dictionary and the article uses this subreddit as justification!

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/dad%20joke

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/youthfulcomrade
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
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What word in the dictionary is always spelt incorrectly?

Incorrectly!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aadhar690
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
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I am having a really bad day, somebody ripped the front and back pages out of my dictionary.

It just goes from Bad to Worse!

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crowkiller06
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
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What's the first word in the dictionary?

It's the word defined as "Preceding all others in time, order, or importance".

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MaxPower1177
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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I just read the whole dictionary in one sitting.

I learned the definition of boring.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DLXCubing
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
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Did you here? They made a stage production of the dictionary.

It was a play on words.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StochasticTinkr
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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Why did the Books bully the online dictionary?

Because it is spineless

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TexasWegieee
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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I threw a dictionary at a witch once.

But I missed. If only I had more experience casting spells!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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So far I've memorized seven pages of this dictionary;

I've learned next to nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/H_G_Bells
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
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I slept so badly last night I started reading the dictionary

By 4am I was past caring...

πŸ‘︎ 257
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
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What’s the longest word in the dictionary?

Smiles. Because there’s a mile between the two S’s.

My dad told me this one this morning.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Christmas-Pickle
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
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Somebody broke into my house and stole my Oxford English Dictionary.

I’m lost for words.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
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Some one stole my dictionary and thesaurus

I don't know what to say, I have no words

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/linkhandford
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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I've been bench pressing 10 dictionaries everyday for the past 4 weeks.

I've finally got some definition in my arms.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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What word on the dictionary is spelled wrong?

Wrong.

πŸ‘︎ 99
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Guyshu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
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Looked up β€œUncanny” in the dictionary

And the definition was very weird.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/maximusheadroom
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
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I stole my gf dictionary and she didn't say a thing

I guess she had no words left for that

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spoonbad
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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Someone stole my friend’s dictionary.

When I asked him about what happened, he didn’t answer.

He was left without words.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iOSIRIX-REx
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
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I dropped a dictionary on my foot yesterday...

Today, I woke up with thesaurus toe.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jim-Bob-Luke
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
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I’m so bored that I just memorized six pages of the dictionary.

I learned next to nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
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My friend stole my dictionary

I’m at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kramj007
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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I can’t believe somebody stole my dictionary.

I’m at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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I confronted my friend Mark because he refuses to return my dictionary.

I said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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I was really angry at my friend Mark for stealing my dictionary

I said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 364
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
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Someone stole my dictionary!

I have no words. :(

πŸ‘︎ 60
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vidarino
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I once swallowed a dictionary

I had thesaurus throat ever.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mysticdawn158
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I was really mad at my friend Mark for stealing my dictionary.

I said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I was so bored over quarantine that I memorized 6 pages of the dictionary

I learned next to nothing

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/superto3
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the only word in the dictionary spelled incorrectly?

Incorrectly

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/countryroads8484
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I was so bored that I memorized 6 pages of the dictionary.

I learned next to nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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There is one word spelled wrong in the dictionary.
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/coot32
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
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I swallowed a dictionary yesterday.

It was thesaurus throat I've ever had.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/24Anuj24
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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I was so bored that I memorized 6 pages of a dictionary

I learned next to nothing

πŸ‘︎ 137
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sexxc
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
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My mom bought me a cheap dictionary for my birthday

I couldn’t find the words to thank her.

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cacarrizales
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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What’s the longest word in the dictionary?

Smiles. Because there’s a mile between the two S’s.

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
I was really angry when I found out that my buddy Mark stole my dictionary.

I confronted him and said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 89
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report

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