I danced around dealing with my obsession for years...
Who danced with the skeleton at the Halloween party?
No one. He had no body to dance with.
Last night I spilled a bunch of small thumbtacks, then danced to the beat of them hitting the floor
That's right; I got down to brass tacks.
What dance do epileptics do?
A man recently ran up to me announcing that he was a primary color, then instructed me to perform a modern dance trend on the fourth letter of the alphabet and food coloring.
He said "I'm blue, dab a D, dab a dye".
Why is it so difficult to train dogs to dance?
Because they have two left feet
I finally watched Dirty Dancing for the first time.
I had the time of my life.
When does a farmer dance?
My kids started dancing while cleaning up the house.
It was some pretty good chore-eography.
The Hammer Time dance should be considered a ball room dance.
I tried to teach my dog to dance today...
He's hopeless. He's got two left feet.
"How do you make a tissue dance?
"You put a little boogie in it."
wife says she's going to dance on my grave when i die
that's ok i'm getting buried at sea
Did you know bees communicate by dancing?
I have a dancing fish
The only problem is that it only does it once and lasts about 20 seconds
Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic
But it was a false Salaam.
How do you make a Kleenex dance?
You put a little boogie in it.
(My husband told this joke to our four year old and she can’t stop laughing.)
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
He had no”body” to dance with
Who did Fankenstein take to the dance?
A man walks in to a bar. On the bar is a duck tap dancing on a biscuit tin.
He is amazed and wants to buy the duck.
The man refuses at first but eventually agreed.
As the man walks out of the bar the now owner of the duck shouts.
Excuse me how do i stop the duck tap dancing.
Simple says the man lift up the tin and blow out the candle......
Did you hear about the dancing bird?
What music genre do chickens like to dance to?
I was drinking and dancing at this club for hours and hours when I dropped my watch
My 9 month pregnant wife is ready to have our child any day now, but they just won’t come. She’s tried everything she can at this point. Sex, walking, dancing, spicy foods, etc... So when I asked her what I could do to help she said “any means necessary.”
To which I replied “No it doesn’t.”
What do social media and dancing former vice presidents have in common?
I just went to go visit my late grandmother buried in the cemetery, but when I went there I found her dancing!
It was quite the Plot Twist
I was dancing with a woman in a bar and things were getting heated.
"Want to go back to my place?" I asked.
"Of course," she replied.
I said, "Here are the keys. Make sure you let the dog out for a shit."
Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?
He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.
I’m writing a Spanish song about how I dance more than anyone.
A guy asks a girl to go to a dance.
She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally, he gets his suit. He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally buys flowers. He picks up the girl and they go to the dance. There is a long line into the dance, so they wait and wait. Finally, they get into the dance, and the guy offers to get the girl a drink. She asks for punch, so he goes to the drink table, and there is no punch line.
This week on Dancing With the Tsars
Ivan was Terrible, Peter & Catherine were Great, and Boris was Godunov.
Learning to Ballet dance
That'll keep you on your toes
(Got this one from my 4 year old) how do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
Never been more proud
Why are highschool dances such a joke?
The punchline is too long
Why are cows bad at dancing?
Why couldn't the programmer dance to the song?
Because he didn't get the... algo-rhythm...
Why couldn’t the skeleton dance?
It had no body to dance with
How do you make a Kleenex dance?
How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it
How do you make a hankerchief dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
How do you make a tissue dance?
How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it
How do you make a Kleenex dance?
Put a little boogie in it!
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