Dad’s old postcard still cracks me up
πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dschwanh
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2021
🚨︎ report
I fell at work and cracked my tailbone. Now I can’t sit down and I have to listen to everyone’s wise cracks..

All in all it’s been a real pain in the ass!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NicholasMirth
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s a more concrete term for butt crack?

Asphalt.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KhaleesiDog
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Which rapper cracks great jokes?

Kendrick Lmao

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wizadi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
🚨︎ report
The best time of day to ingest eggs is at the crack of dawn.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a drunk person staggering along a street on their way home trying not to step on the cracks in the pavement?

Stuporstitious.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SvenSvenkill3
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
🚨︎ report
I wanted to crack a joke on trains. I could not EXPRESS it well

Think, I'll need a COACH

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slypikachu69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
How does the muslim butcher respond when someone cracks a joke?

"Ha Lol"

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Adithya_Meher
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
🚨︎ report
We need to crack down on Marijuana usage
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jamieisntgay
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
It might crack under pressure.
πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SorenRL
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My Bro-in-law cracks me up XD
πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrDraagyn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I crack bad jokes about having to borrow my parents old clothes because my job doesn't pay well...

What can I say? I've got my father's jeans.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cumdaddy01
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you crack a rooster’s egg?

A dad yolk.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MGreenMN
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My drug dealer is hilarious He *cracks* me up

Follow me on twitter for more! πŸ‘‰πŸ‘ˆ

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/J4ke13
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Reading it with an accent like Sean Connery cracks me up!
πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tribelawn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife cracks me up.

She’s a great chiropractor.

πŸ‘︎ 71
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yankee_Man
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I always try to avoid cracks in the pavement
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Coprywriter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
These pants crack me up...

https://preview.redd.it/294ds0yrw2h51.jpg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=59aecd04a9f1a84f21ea972df9bb31ca8d0bf046

Puma pants.

Pu...ma...pants.

Poo my pants.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ConstipatedGibbon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Really cracks me up
πŸ‘︎ 417
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NicholasP993
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Thermite be another way to crack this safe.
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/supguyyo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know what happens when you crack an egg?

It becomes a shell of its former self.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ArkticDarkness
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What happened to the crack-dealing demon?

Arrested for possession.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CheesusHChrust
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
If plumbers have plumbers crack what do construction workers have?

Asphalt (My dads been telling this one since I was 12, never heard it anywhere else πŸ˜‚)

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MisterGriimm
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife and I crack each other's backs every morning

It's a joint effort

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NunYaBizzNas
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a crack lab, what does it make?

Methane

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sea_Emperour
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I believe I am ready to become a dad, that cracks cringe worthy jokes.

Friend: mmmm, I love seafood. Me: mmm I see food, I eat it.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Let’s start this off by breaking the ice. It’s a slippery subject, but I know we can crack it!
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoFish484
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I can’t bake a pun that’ll crack you up because they’re all scrambled in my head

I’m such a egghead

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashgallade
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
🚨︎ report
This cracks me up
πŸ‘︎ 803
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/euanwmcgill
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call Nikki Minaj’s butt crack?

Silicon Valley.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gamingpron0t
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Mother Superior had to crack down on sisters wearing perfume in the convent.

She said she would not tolerate such nun scents.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emjay144
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Sounds like a joke my dad would crack at the dinner table. /r/3amjokes/comments/fzt6…
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yugglez
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Crack house
πŸ‘︎ 87
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πŸ‘€︎ u/anaximandra
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I say this anytime someone says, β€œThat cracks me up!”

β€œGood thing you’re not an egg!”

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cactiscandy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
My son has been throwing paper darts around and a big one got stuck in my butt crack

To be honest it’s a massive plane in the arse

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lukeurmyson
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife swiped our debit card on my butt crack.

She said "transaction denied, insufficient buns."

πŸ‘︎ 87
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FletchLives1980
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Slight crack in it
πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/1ZacNolan1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
my cousin doesnt often think before she cracks a joke
πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dykejoon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I just fixed the cracks in the wall...

...it looks spack-tacular.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/weirdgroovynerd
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Just for the crack
πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/spookyAGENT
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report
There's a massive crack
πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/XGN_Carter1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I crack myself up sometimes [OC]
πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CCplusplus
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2018
🚨︎ report
I crack myself up sometimes. I went grocery shopping earlier today and when I got home the wife asked β€œwhere are the mushrooms?” ... without missing a beat, I said

β€œI couldn’t get them, there wasn’t β€˜mush room’ in the trolley. β€œ

She threw things at me

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DannyGere
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife and I crack each other's backs every morning

It's a joint effort

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NunYaBizzNas
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My drug dealer cracks me up.
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fukhed69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2018
🚨︎ report
I can’t bake a good pun that will crack you up, they’re all just scrambled in my head

i’m such a egg head

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashgallade
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2020
🚨︎ report

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