(On The Spot Joke) My Partner was in bed cracking her back and asked.....

β€œHey can you hear my back crack”

I replied β€œyea can you hear my ass crack” then proceeded with the filthiest fart known to man

Absolute crack up. Hahahahahah even she laughed

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BaccyBuegs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 07 2021
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By buddies and I were drinking beer and cracking jokes, but things started to get out of hand.

It was quite the brew-haha.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Shu-di
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 19 2021
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My boss fired me for cracking to many Asian jokes.

It ended my Korea.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 269
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 22 2019
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An audience member asked me how I made the brisk sharp cracking sound with my hand.

I told her it was a snap.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 02 2020
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I live in genuine terror of boiling an egg and cracking it open to find a dead, boiled chick inside

No yolk

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AnnoyingChef
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 17 2019
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New pizza place opened up. Cracking menu. Radagast the Brownie is my favorite.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ThorsRake
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 06 2018
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This screen protector is in cracking shape!
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Gam1ngChair
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 01 2019
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Cracking open a cold one with the boys
πŸ‘οΈŽ 48
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PungentMayo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 12 2018
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My mom sent me this picture with the caption "Dad wants to know what he should eat first... He's just cracking himself up..."
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FrolickinWithAbandon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 24 2013
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I thought about cracking a joke to my wife’s sewing club, but decided against it.

They were already in stitches.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 29
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/incenseandelephants
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2018
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Recently, Oxford has been cracking down on the proper use of punctuation.

Honestly, I'm entirely on board with this. This has be-comma issue within the community.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/proteen18
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 23 2018
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I was cracking up... tough crowd though.

Son (age 5): I don't want scrambled eggs for breakfast!

Me: What do you mean? You love scrambled eggs!

Son: I used to like them more but we've had them so much I don't like them anymore.

Me: Sounds like you're having... an egg-sistential crisis.

Son: ... what?

Me: Never mind, eat your eggs.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 220
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/spoonhocket
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 28 2014
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What did the sarcastic comedian say to the wise cracking toilet paper?

You're on a roll, aren't ya?!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lucas_powerglove
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 12 2017
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Had a cracking joke from recent family holiday to Grenada

My parents, girlfriend and I were walking around exploring one of the neighbouring islands when we saw a sign that said "youth recreational grounds" on it, but was just a field full of goats.

My dad exclaims "pretty sure these aren't the youths that the council had in mind"

And I retort "either way, I hear it's a great place to bring your kids"

...Cue groans

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WallytheWarlock
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 16 2016
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CNN Money had me cracking up this morning money.cnn.com/2015/07/16/…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Wizardofozeltamivir
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 17 2015
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Statisticians don't like cracking mean jokes...

..they always turn out to be average....

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/andrei178
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 27 2015
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This guy has been cracking me up for years

Hell, he's been making me laugh my whole life.

Me: "I'm gonna take a shower"

Dad: "Well alright...Just leave one for everyone else."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FroFoSho
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 01 2013
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My dad was cracking up
πŸ‘οΈŽ 41
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Stoovy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2013
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After cracking a few punny Dad Jokes to my friends, I was floored by my friend's response.

Friend 1: You'll be great at Dad Jokes when you become a Dad.

Me: That may be a while away. At least it means I'll get laid.

Friend 2: You know that's not what kids are for...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 29
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AlexTheGiant
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 27 2014
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my dad cracking himself up

I walked into the living room and he didn't have any lights on, so I said "just sitting in the dark?" and he said "no, I'm sitting in the chair" and made himself crack up

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/googler94
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 15 2013
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Hauling my truck back to Michigan. My dad won't stop cracking this one, "Man that guy is on my ass!!" Followed by historically laughing.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mteazy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 27 2013
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Dad just dropped this one without even cracking a smile.

Brother: (Telling a story about how a kid threw his poop at his work (he works with kids with psychological disorders)) ...And so that's why there's that poo-stain.

Dad: I think I saw them in concert once, must have been '82.

Me (playing along): How were they?

Dad: They were really crappy...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/maphillips
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 16 2013
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Mom: "Stop cracking your knuckles, it causes arthritis."

Me: "No it doesn't, that's just a myth."

Dad: "Maybe it's just myth-understood."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GambitGamer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 01 2014
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My wife accused me of cracking a dad joke, I couldn't be prouder

6 year old daughter is showing how well she does splits and touches her nose to her knee.

"Daddy, can you touch your nose to your knee?"

"Honey, I can't touch my nose to your knee."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/freemdoom
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 13 2014
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My boss fired me for cracking too many Asian jokes.

It ended my Korea.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 134
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 22 2019
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