Was checking my son's essay about the countryside and saw he kept writing the word 'hll'. So I told him to never forget...

The hills have 'i's.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
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An English lady, while vacationing in Switzerland, fell in love with a small town and the surrounding countryside.

She asked the pastor of a local church if he knew of any houses with rooms to rent that were close to town, but out in the country. The pastor kindly drove her out to see a house with a room to rent. She loved the house and decided to rent the room. Then, the lady returned to her home in England to make her final preparations to move to Switzerland.

When she arrived back home, the thought occurred to her that she had not seen a β€œW.C.” in the room or even down the hall. (A W.C. is short for β€œwater closet” and is what the English call a toilet.) So she immediately emailed the pastor to ask him where the β€œW.C.” is located.

The Swiss pastor had never heard of a β€œW.C.,” and so he Googled the abbreviation and found an article titled β€œWayside Chapels.” Thinking that the English lady was asking about a country church to attend near her new home, the pastor responded as follows:

Ms. Smith,

I look forward to your move. Regarding your question about the location of the W.C., the closest W.C. is situated only two miles from the room you have rented, in the center of a beautiful grove of pine trees. The W.C. has aΒ maximum occupancy of 229 people, but not that many people usually go on weekdays. I suggest youΒ plan to go on Thursday evenings when there is a sing-along. The acoustics are remarkable and the happy sounds of so many people echo throughout the W.C.

Sunday mornings are extremely crowded. The locals tend to arrive early and many bring their lunches to make a day of it. Those who arrive just in time can usually be squeezed into the W.C. before things start, but not always. Best to go early if you can!

It may interest you to know that my own daughter was married in the W.C. and it was there that she met her husband. I remember how everyone crowded in to sit close to the bride and groom. There were two people to a seat ordinarily occupied by one, but our friends and family were happy to share. Β I will admit that my wife and I felt particularly relieved when it was over. We were truly wiped out.

Because of my responsibilities in town, I can’t go as often as I used to. In fact, I haven’t been in well over a year. I can tell you I really miss regularly going to the W.C. Let’s plan on going together for your first visit. I can reserve us seats where you will be seen by all.


Pastor Kurt Meier

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
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I was riding my bike through the countryside when I was attacked by a herd of sheep...

Fortunately, I was only grazed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porkchop_d_clown
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2019
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When my friend from New York City drove to Nebraska in his Honda SUV, he went for a walk in the countryside...

He was out of his Element.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2019
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What do you call a hopeless romantic who wanders the countryside?


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πŸ‘€︎ u/RhynoCTR
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
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As we were driving through the countryside, I looked at my boy and said, "Mountains aren’t just funny..."

"...they’re hill areas."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
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Have you ever seen the midwest's aMAZEing countryside

I know, it's pretty corny.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PlerpIsaiah
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2018
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Breaking news: there is a pack of wild dogs rampaging through the countryside.

But police say they have no leads.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lewisc7593
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2014
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I'm a successful salesman for mobile internet contracts

But every time I visit the countryside I get soft and lose my edge

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πŸ‘€︎ u/D0tBlue
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
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Practical jokes for the car

These are some of the practical jokes my dad would do while driving to "entertain" us:

  1. Driving slow next to a jogger, turning down the window and asking "You seem to be in a hurry. Need a lift?" I would usually hide under a seat in shame.

  2. On a hot day in a car without AC, he'd use the standard question "Hot enough for everyone?" which just gave him groans and a loud "yes". - "Well, in this case I can turn down the thermostat again". (Of course, he'd just been turning it up right before his question without anyone noticing)

  3. Instead of driving right in a roundabout and taking the third exit, he'd drive left and take the first "to save gas", creeping the shit out of everyone. This was out on the countryside with no cars anywhere to be seen.

Any other stories you guys have?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yes_oui_si_ja
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2016
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I flipped so hard.

So me and my dad (yeah, I got dadjoked by my DAD. Now isen't that something new on this thread) were driving in the countryside, when we got to a farm which lays almost completely up to the road. The hens had broken loose, so because we didn't want to drive them over we waited for the road to clear. After about 10 seconds of waiting, my dad turned to me and said: ''Well, I guess we're cockblocked'' I fucking burst out laughing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zylvian
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2014
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Dadjoked my dad from halfway across the planet.

My Father is currently on vacation with my Mother in Vietnam and everyday he sends photo trip reports.

Today he emailed me and sent the following.

Countryside on way to My Son Sanctuary.

My Son is thick in the middle of the jungle.

To which I replied back.

"No I'm not, I'm at work."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrGoodGlow
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2015
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