Contemptible Puns

A list of puns related to "Contemptible"

What do you call a clever yet contemptible Brit who makes chocolate and candy in a super-secret factory?

Wily Wanka!

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👤︎ u/pippingigi
📅︎ Jul 01 2020
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Why was the chicken held in contempt of court?

For laying under oath.

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👤︎ u/emjay144
📅︎ Jun 18 2020
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Familiarity Breeds Contempt

My friend's family has a dog named Sugar. Her dad answered the door and I walked inside. Me: "Hey Sugar!" Her Dad: "Don't call me Sugar, I don't know you that well."

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👤︎ u/pizza2004
📅︎ Mar 06 2014
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Dadjoked my father-in-law

Father-in-law gets out of the shower, says to my husband,"You're up!" I reply, "Asia!" :::crickets::: I add, "Oh, I thought we were just saying names of continents." The look of jealous contempt from my FIL was priceless.

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👤︎ u/Asparagusbelle
📅︎ Jan 02 2015
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Brightening my BF's recovery from surgery with Dad Jokes

Background: My boyfriend is stuck on crutches after having hip surgery and likes to sit in the recliner with his legs propped up. Since he can't move his hips, I have to lower the footrest for him to get out of the chair.

Him: Can you put my feet down so I can go relax in the bed for a while?

Me: Feet, you're stupid and useless and no one likes you!

Him giving me silence with a side of contempt while I cackle.

Laughter is the best medicine...

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👤︎ u/HuskeyG
📅︎ May 25 2014
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