Conjoined Puns

A list of puns related to "Conjoined"

My dad was born with a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

I have an uncle, once removed.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Apr 02 2021
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What do you call conjoined twins that have emotionally bonded?

Close.

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👤︎ u/fried_cereal69
📅︎ Nov 03 2020
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What do you call conjoined dolphins

Dual porpoise

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👤︎ u/kickypie
📅︎ Aug 25 2020
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My dad was a conjoined twin.

We called his brother "My uncle on my father's side."

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👤︎ u/ChildfreeAtheist1024
📅︎ May 06 2020
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Why are conjoined twins good at getting 40 on a dartboard?

They always get double tops.

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Nov 21 2019
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Yeah, I could get surgery to remove my conjoined twin

But I'm rather attached to them.

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👤︎ u/SonofaTimeLord
📅︎ Aug 21 2019
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I met conjoined twins and I'm not sure which one I like more.

They're neck and neck.

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Sep 08 2018
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Why did the Conjoined twins go to England?

So the other one could drive for a change.

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👤︎ u/ab_ovo_usque_ad_mala
📅︎ Mar 25 2018
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Did you hear they separated the conjoined twins?

Now, one brother's all that's left.

Don't worry though. The other one is all right.

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👤︎ u/Taodyn
📅︎ Nov 19 2013
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I angered two people today by calling them hipsters...

Apparently, the correct term is conjoined twins...

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Jan 19 2019
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Paradox.

It has been proposed that an ox may never birth a conjoined twin

But if it did it would be a Paired Ox.

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👤︎ u/Hasrirama
📅︎ Apr 26 2020
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They say it takes one to know one.

This is especially true if it's a conjoined twin.

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Jul 01 2020
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I ran into two hippies today, and they both seem really mad at me.

Apparently the correct term is “conjoined twins”.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ May 15 2020
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Combined my first 2 joke sets into 1. Enjoy!

I will now take suggestions on how to be more sensitive to deaf people. I'm all ears!

  1. As a ventroliquist, I made one of my dummies sing a song by the GoGos. I'm not going to tell you how I did it. My lips are sealed!
  2. Im the only council member against the construction of the beach. Im going against the grain!
  3. Why did God make me a conjoined twin? Im beside myself!
  4. I put aluminum on a villain's mind control devices. I foiled his plan!
  5. Even though I'm scared of heights, I still go skydiving with this girl I like. Im falling for her!
  6. My shoelace company collapsed. I couldn't make ends meet!
  7. I like using misdirection in my jokes to make people laugh. Or do I?
  8. I won my 17th straight Halloween costume contest dressed as a hotdog. I'm on a roll!
  9. I won my 17th straight Halloween costume contest dressed as a nerd. I'm honor roll!
  10. The answer to this question, "Who's the president of the United States?" is a no-brainer.
  11. I finished a race the other day. I won 'cause I killed all the Kenyans!
  12. I don't know how to wear a wig. At least not off the top of my head.
  13. I went grocery shopping at Harris Teeter for a 50% off everything sale. I went in for a carrot and came out with a half, which is why I now shop at Whole Foods!
  14. If youre being attacked by zombies, just throw a party! Nobody wants to kill the life of the party!
  15. I used to date a girl, who still uses a nightlight. What a turn-off!
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👤︎ u/ADAToTheMoon
📅︎ Dec 10 2018
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My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

So I have an uncle, once removed.

👍︎ 16k
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Nov 26 2020
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My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

So, I have an uncle, once removed.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Mar 22 2021
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My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at work.

So, I have an uncle, once removed.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Jan 18 2021
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My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

So, I have an uncle once removed.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Dec 23 2020
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My dad was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

I have an uncle, once removed.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Apr 08 2020
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My father was born with a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

I have an uncle, once removed.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Dec 22 2019
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I angered two people by callling them hipsters.......

Apparently the correct term is conjoined twins.

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👤︎ u/BaltBisneyBorld
📅︎ Jun 20 2019
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I angered two people today by calling them hipsters...

Apparently the correct term is conjoined twins...

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👤︎ u/Hugh_Jass5
📅︎ Jun 20 2019
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Heres one

I offended two people by calling them hipsters

Apparently the correct term is conjoined twins

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👤︎ u/RoyalSeptember
📅︎ Jun 19 2019
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I angered two people today by calling them "hipsters"

I guess the term "conjoined twins" is what they prefer.

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👤︎ u/Cockasauras_Rex
📅︎ Jun 20 2019
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