A list of puns related to "Computational Science"
"Well, to be perfectly honest, it did take him a couple bytes."
I told her that whatever she chooses, it's going to be a major difference.
I am learning how to Excel in spreadsheets in my computer science class
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My first degree is computer science, but I'm also going for second degree murder
Sister: We really need to send the dog to puppy school
Me: To what, earn his dogtorate?
Hehe...
I work as a salesman in a call center. We were going over some of the more interesting names weβve seen and called. Without disclosing the last name my neighbor said oh, you havenβt heard of βCytoplasm XXXXXXXβ? I answered. The guy is a computer programmer who Iβd imagine changed his name to that unless his parents are that cruel. I start rambling off βCytoplasm?? Of all the organelles in a eukaryotic cell to name yourself you pick cytoplasm?! What about Golgi apparatus, or endoplasmic reticulum?β My manager chimes in βwow you memorized a lot from bioβ I told her I went to college for science shit but βnow here I am making phone calls as a professional, thanks collegeβ to which my neighbor replies.... βI guess now you could say youβre a PROkaryote
One of the funniest school puns; science puns
Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK. If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, theyβd be alloys.
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.
If youβre not part of the solution, youβre part of the precipitate.
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, βNo, Iβm traveling light.β
Did you just mutate for a stop codon? Because youβre talking nonsense!
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
What did Gregor Mendel say when he founded genetics? Woopea!
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? Heβs 0K now.
I wish I was adenine, then, I could get paired with U.
Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says βI think Iβll have an H2O.β The second one says βI think Iβll have an H2O tooβ β and he died.
A couple of biologists had twins. They named one Jessica and the other Control.
Did you hear the one about the recycling triplets? Their names are Polly, Ethel, and Ian.
Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!
What element is a girlβs future best friend? Carbon.
I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.
Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.
What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? I like your βstyle.β
Iβm reading a great book on anti-gravity. I canβt put it down.
I have a new theory on inertia but it doesnβt seem to be gaining momentum.
Why canβt atheists solve exponential equations? Because they donβt believe in higher powers.
Schrodingerβs cat walks into a bar. And doesnβt.
Do you know the name Pavlov? It rings a bell.
What does a subatomic duck say? Quark!
A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a beer. Bartender replies βFor you, no chargeβ.
Two atoms are walking along. One of them says: βOh, no, I think I lost an electron.β βAre you sure?β
βYe
... keep reading on reddit β‘In my computer science course, my very old professor busts this out during a discussion of logic:
"I went to a logic conference once, and the lecturer said, 'it's interesting that a double negative gives you a positive, isn't it? I mean, a double positive doesn't give you a negative.'
Someone from the back of the room scoffed and went, 'yeah, yeah.'"
Half the class chuckled, half the class groaned.
Text conversation between me and my friend in my computer science class while we are doing an excel spreadsheet.
My friend: Hey I really messed up this spreadsheet can you send it to me when you're finished? Me: Yeah sure if I ever finish it haha. My friend: Word thanks Me: No this is Excel.
I could hear her groan from across the room.
The other day, my 2 year old son and I went to visit my dad at his new job as a college teacher. As he was giving us a tour, we stopped by the office of the computer science professor to chat. My son saw some computer monitors on the floor in his office and asked "what's that?" To which the computer professor, who is a grandpa himself, replied "those are monitors. Maybe I should set them outside my door, then they'd be HALL monitors!" We three dad's got a good chuckle out of that. My toddler, not so much.
When he doubted me, I said, "Well, it took him a couple of bytes."
It took him a couple of bytes
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