I ate a clock
It was very time consuming lucky I went back for seconds
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︎ Apr 30 2021
I put a clock on my belt
π︎ 201
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︎ May 01 2021
What is the downside of eating a clock?
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︎ Apr 28 2021
A clock started training for a marathon
Now everyone's mad it runs fast.
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︎ Apr 11 2021
What happens when you accidentally drop you Viagra on your clock?
Your gonna have a hard time...
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︎ Apr 08 2021
For My Birthday My Kids Gave Me An Alarm Clock That Sweared At Me Instead Of Buzzing.
It was quite a rude awakening.
Source: Corny Dad Jokes
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︎ May 03 2021
I used to eat watches and clocks for every meal, but I had to stop.
It was too time consuming.
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︎ Jan 17 2021
How many times in a day can you look at a clock?
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︎ Apr 26 2021
What's the difference between a boy clock and a girl clock?
A boy clock goes "tick tock, tick tock, tick tock" and a girl clock just tocks...and tocks...and tocks.
π︎ 49
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︎ Mar 07 2021
The alarm clock may be bulky, dirty, and poorly designed
But it's what's on the inside that counts.
π︎ 10
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︎ Apr 19 2021
Imagine if alarm clocks hit you back in the morning.
It would be truly alarming.
π︎ 6
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︎ Mar 24 2021
Whats the best time on a clock?
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︎ Jan 25 2021
Clock tower maintenance workers are going on strike!
βItβs about high time,β commented the union representative.
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︎ Mar 26 2021
If a clock you ordered arrived in the mail,
That means your time is here
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︎ Mar 08 2021
My boyfriend told me he already turned the clocks forward an hour in the kitchen. I told him he is a man ahead of his time.
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︎ Mar 14 2021
βDad, did you remember to move the clocks forward last night?β
βYeah, but they fell off the shelf.β
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︎ Mar 15 2021
Guys! They finally made a story about clocks!
And itβs about time too.
π︎ 49
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︎ Feb 11 2021
My friend makes a living off of being the sound of a clock.
Her actual words were, "I'm a tiktoker," but I knew what she meant.
π︎ 8
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︎ Mar 27 2021
I thought my friends believed I was the clock
But it ends up they were just winding me up.
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︎ Apr 04 2021
Why did the clock go back four seconds?
π︎ 45
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︎ Feb 23 2021
i tried to eat a clock yesterday.
It was quite time consuming.
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︎ Jan 28 2021
When you order a clock online and it arrives
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︎ Mar 09 2021
So I asked the employee if I could see the clock for sale, so she gave it to me. I asked my dad if I could buy it.
My dad said βwe donβt have Time for that, weβre gonna leave any Second now, so Hand it back to the lady and head back to Hour carβ
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︎ Mar 19 2021
Why did the old man throw his clock out of the window?
Because he wanted to see time fly!
π︎ 8
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︎ Feb 23 2021
Before the clock strikes midnight on december 31st be sure to lift your left leg
That way you will start off the new year on the right foot
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︎ Dec 29 2020
Donβt annoy clocks
Or theyβll get ticked off.
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︎ Feb 17 2021
I havent read a book in ages. So i decided to start with a book of how clocks work.
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︎ Jan 08 2021
Just thought this : I went to the doctor cause I was pooping clocks
The doctor told me i was wasting time
π︎ 10
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︎ Feb 20 2021
What is a clocks favorite spice
π︎ 9
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︎ Feb 20 2021
It took me over 6 months to come up with a joke about calendars and clocks.
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︎ Mar 02 2021
Don't ever try eating a clock if you're in a hurry
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︎ Jan 14 2021
Why did the clock get fat?
It kept going for seconds.
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︎ Nov 04 2020
Why are clocks so good at maths?
Because every second counts.
π︎ 8
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︎ Feb 03 2021
The most important thing to me is my alarm clock
Itβs what gets me out of bed in the morning
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 21 2021
Why should you never believe a clock?
It usually has second hand information
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︎ Nov 22 2020
Why did The conservative get rid of his alarm clock?
Because every morning it wanted him to get woke
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︎ Feb 01 2021
How does a clock get fat?
It gains weight OVER TIME
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︎ Jan 09 2021
Why do they call it a grandfather clock?
π︎ 18
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︎ Jan 04 2021
What do you call a belt with a clock on it?
π︎ 3
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︎ Apr 24 2021
Yesterday I ate a clock....
It was very time consuming, especially when I went back for seconds.
π︎ 5
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︎ Mar 24 2021
What does a clock do when he's still hungry
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︎ Mar 16 2021
I just ate a clock
It was very time consuming
π︎ 7
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︎ Feb 16 2021
What does a clock do when itβs hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
π︎ 11k
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︎ Jun 29 2020
Last night I ate a clock
It was very time consuming.
Especially when I went back for seconds.
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︎ Dec 17 2020
Make sure that your left leg is up before the clock hits midnight tomorrow.
That way you start 2021 on the right foot.
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︎ Dec 30 2020
Have you ever tried to eat a clock?
It's very time consuming.
π︎ 10
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︎ Feb 18 2021
Have you ever tried to eat a clock?
It's very time consuming.
π︎ 88
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︎ Oct 19 2020
Yesterday, I ate a clock.
It was very time consuming, especially when I went back for seconds.
π︎ 37
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︎ Nov 30 2020
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