Chinese take out: 8 dollars. Tip: 2 dollars. Getting home to find out they forgot part of your order...

Riceless

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Degtyrev
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Do you know what happened to Jack Ma after he criticized the Chinese Government?

[removed]

๐Ÿ‘︎ 91
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cthulhouette
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I once knew a girl who married a Chinese.

She had to Chang her last name.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/BonsamBesuDMC2
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I ordered some General Tso chicken from my favorite Chinese Restaurant but they were all out of MSG...

It was just Tso Tso.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 36
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/THIATUS-RIFT
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A man was recently charged with vandalizing a chinese restaurant

Police say it was a case of wonton destruction

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Feral1991
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My mate had a combined Burns Night and Chinese New Year party he called Chinese Burns Night

I wasn't going to go, but he twisted my arm

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/localgasgiant
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Mark Knopfler is opening a Chinese restaurant

He's calling it Wok of Life

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/canyonstom
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I got two cookies in one bag at the Chinese restaurant...

I was very fortunate

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/hotsprings1234
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just invested in a Chinese cookie factory.

Iโ€™m going to make a fortune!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 15
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/morsodo99
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I had to reprimand my son for cutting up his dumplings at the Chinese restaurant last night.

I can't condone such wonton acts of destruction.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 52
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mkrjoe
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why donโ€™t Chinese kids believe in Christmas

Because they make the toys!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Jeffro4140
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was considering investing in a Chinese distillery but decided against it.

Whiskey business.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/1963Jan
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the lion walk into the Chinese restaurant to get a haircut?

Because he wanted a low mane.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CMoy1980
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I want to open a Chinese food buffet

It will be called "All You Can Eat and Dim Sum"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cwiersma26
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What vessels sail the waters of the Chinese internet?

Censorships.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 30
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Brixenaru
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
what song do chinese cannibals sing before dinner?

We will wok you

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Pretlik
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What is the Devil's favourite Chinese Sauce?

Hoi- SIN sauce.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bbew_Mot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a Chinese camera man?

Phil Ming.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why don't Chinese kids believe in Santa ?

Because they're the ones who makes the toys.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Whatโ€™s a Tauntaunโ€™s favorite Chinese soup?

WaunTaun

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/siphodeus
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I ordered a large duck at the Chinese last night...

The bill was huge.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
They gave me a fork because I'm not Chinese.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 6k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DannyDevitosMagnumD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How much does a Chinese dumpling weigh ?

WonTon.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the lion get his hair cut on his way to the Chinese restaurant?

Because he wanted a Lo Mein

๐Ÿ‘︎ 69
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/clark_creationz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I asked my Chinese friend what it's like to live in China

He says he can't complain

๐Ÿ‘︎ 269
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dudebrostien
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Me and my wife got into an argument about how to contact an ancient Chinese dynasty...

She said...

"Talk to the Hans."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/HypnotizeD_X
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Did you hear about Chinese restaurant that blew up?

Scenes of wonton destruction.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JEZTURNER
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do the Chinese do during an erection?

They vote!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/detrickster
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I rented out a room to two beautiful Chinese Women..

They never complain, they keep to themselves and they always pay their rent on time. The only weird thing is they insist on paying me in stir-fry. But all in all, I guess they're pretty lo mein tenants.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 30
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Schnauss
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why do Chinese people not need to eat using knives?

Because they use chop sticks

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/obiwan_kenobinil
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A Chinese kid was born before the due date

Parents named him โ€œSudden Leeโ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 52
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/schiggy182
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My friend was listening to Chinese rap.

I told him it was crap.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ksawesome
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Who is the God of Chinese food?

MSG-sus

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/callmefinny
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Two chinese Christians are having a contest to see who can contact God the fastest. After one wins, the other looks at him and says

"Well prayed"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/runew0lf
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you tell a Jedi-in-training that struggles to use chopsticks at a Chinese buffet?

Use the forks, Luke.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 25
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/AstrosAtoZ
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Where do Chinese Chefs go to after their break?

Back to wok

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/CriticalBiscuits
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Chinese are building all sorts of new educational camps with invigorating physical exercise for Uigher citizens.

It's all fun and games until someone loses an ideology.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/urlordcov
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My grandson got a cookie from a Chinese restaurant with no piece of paper in it

I told him it was very unfortunate

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheRealBobbyC
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If Time is Running Out for a Chinese App

Is the clock TikToking?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/gr8ums
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How do you know Rin Tin Tin's parents were Chinese?

Because they were Ma 'n' Da Rin.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/xholdsteadyx
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
When Biden pressed Trump about his Chinese bank account, Trump admitted...

I lost Yuan

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/holymolybreath
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How Long is a Chinese name

No seriously, it is

๐Ÿ‘︎ 376
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/BinaryPeach
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
An American, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, a Burmese, a Chinese, a Canadian, a Dutchman, a Dane, an Englishman, an Estonian, a German, a Japanese, a Korean, a Mexican, a Nepalese, a Pole, a Russian, and a Welshman all walk into a posh bar. The doorman says sorry, we have standards.

You canโ€™t come in without a Thai.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Rocknocker
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Mark Knopfler is opening a Chinese restaurant

He's calling it Wok of Life

๐Ÿ‘︎ 20
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/canyonstom
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Do you want to know a joke about the Chinese government?

[removed]

๐Ÿ‘︎ 958
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/alphamaya43
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Two chinese Christians are having a contest to see who can contact God the fastest. After one wins, the other looks at him and says

"Well prayed"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9k
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JCokeDaKilla
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A Chinese restaurant was recently destroyed in the riots.

It was wonton destruction.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/not_Teddy_Roosevelt
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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