It was a Fjordian slip.
I said “it’s all downhill from here!”
“There was a schism in the chasm.”
It was anticlimactic.
It was a resounding success.
It was deep.
Shit was intense.
My teacher only wanted the cliff notes though.
But not twice.
I hear it's absolutely gorges!
It's a Long, Long Way to Tipperary
The distance it fell was record breaking
We were taking pictures of the amazing views from the south rim of the canyon and my family wanted a picture with everyone in it. We all line up and my dad taps an older gentleman on the shoulder to take our picture:
My dad: "Hey, can you take our picture?"
Random dad: With a disgusted face he says, "No, I don't want a picture of you people." And walks off.
He took about 5 steps before turning around, laughing to himself, and snapped a great pic of my family. My dad later remarked, "that was a good one."
Czar Chasm.
I only parley see it
It's the perfect jumping off point.
Echolocation!
When I asked him why he shouted that, he said he wanted to share 'echo-nomical.'
My dad had never seen the Grand Canyon before. As soon as he saw it, the first thing he said was "Wow, I wonder how long it took them natives to build this!"
Sudden Canyon!
http://i.imgur.com/iJlDlTP.jpg
> In a group text with my parents and siblings
Me: Ok all, weekly joke: What is the highest form of flattery?
...
Dad: A plateau?
Me: That's correct! Great job dad :).
[The joke was supposed to end here]
Mom: I don't get it..
Dad: Well then you must be in a canyon because it's over your head!
All: LOL!!
The grand canyon.
Dad: Wow, I remember I went to a concert here before...
Me: Here? You mean this canyon?
Dad: Yeah, back in the 80s, I saw the Rolling Stones here!
So he finds the man who owns the horse. The owner takes him to the stable. The buyer asks to take the horse for a test ride.
"Okay," says the owner. "But I'm a retired church pastor. The horse will only go forward if you say, 'Praise the lord.' He will only stop moving if you say 'Hallelujah.' "
Feeling annoyed, the buyer says "That's fine," and he gets up on the horse. After the seller returns to the house, the buyer, mounted on the horse, whips the reins and says, "Hiyah!!" The horse doesn't move. "Yah," he said, spurring the horse. Still no movement. Feeling a little embarrassed and stupid, he complied to the owner's instruction. "Praise the Lord," he mumbled, and the horse began quickly trotting away from the stable.
Wow, the buyer thought, excited. I wonder how fast this horse can go. "Praise the Lord," he said, this time at normal volume. The horse sped up considerably.
Amazing! I must have this horse! the buyer thought. "Praise the Lord!" he shouted. "Praise the Lord!" And the horse kept speeding up. The stable behind them was no longer visible.
But the horse and the buyer were speedily approaching a huge canyon. Seeing this ahead, the buyer commanded, "St- stop! Whoaaa, horse!" But the horse kept the charge forward. "Hallelujah!" the buyer shouted. And the horse stopped at the edge of the vast canyon, with only inches of ground to spare.
Looking up to the sky, the buyer sighed in relief. "Praise the Lord."
So a frog walks into a bank to get a car loan. He walks over to Patricia Wack, who happened to be the loan officer. "Ms. Wack I would like to get a car loan, but I want the title in my name." Ms. Wack asks the frog if has any sort of collateral. He replis "well, all I have is this is this token I got from the Grand Canyon." Patricia tells him there is no way she can take that. Irritated the frog asks the see the manager, so Patricia calls the manager over and explains the situation. The manager looks at the frog, then the token, then Ms. Wack and proclaims, "That's a knick knack Patty Wack give the frog a loan."
While preparing for our roadtrip to the Grand Canyon, my dad was asking everyone (my mom, brother, and I) if we needed to go to the bathroom before we leave. I was around 8 years old at the time, my brother was 5. I had some massive gas that day and my dad took note of it.
I said, "Dad, I don't need to go to the bathroom."
"RhinoWatson, yes you do. You know a fart is just a poo screaming to get out."
Cliff notes.
Czar Chasm.
