A Norwegian fell down a canyon...

It was a Fjordian slip.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
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A woman starting a hike at the Grand Canyon asked me how the trail was as I reached the top

I said β€œit’s all downhill from here!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ATexanHobbit
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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How did Bill Cosby describe the massive earthquake in the Grand Canyon?

β€œThere was a schism in the chasm.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Haaskivi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
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Two people descended down a wall of a canyon.

It was anticlimactic.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2020
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I shouted into the canyon in hopes of hearing my echo.

It was a resounding success.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
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nick canyon
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keepitsweet
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
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I wrote a poem about the Grand Canyon.

It was deep.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_LumberZack_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
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nick canyon
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πŸ‘€︎ u/greengo122
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
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So I went camping in the grand canyon

Shit was intense.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
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I did an essay about Arizona and the Grand Canyon.

My teacher only wanted the cliff notes though.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
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it's possible to jump without a parachute from the top of the Grand Canyon all the way to the bottom.

But not twice.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
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Though I have never been to the Grand Canyon, I want to go!

I hear it's absolutely gorges!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
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A woman gave birth to a head: no arms, no legs, no torso. They named it "Rary" as this was so rare. Rary was not happy and constantly swore. Having enough, the family goes to the Grand Canyon and toss Rary in. As they look over the edge, the mother comments:

It's a Long, Long Way to Tipperary

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2018
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I threw a record into the Grand Canyon

The distance it fell was record breaking

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GamingAstronamy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2018
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Just went on a family vacation to the Grand Canyon and my pops got dadjoked by another dad while we were there.

We were taking pictures of the amazing views from the south rim of the canyon and my family wanted a picture with everyone in it. We all line up and my dad taps an older gentleman on the shoulder to take our picture:

My dad: "Hey, can you take our picture?"

Random dad: With a disgusted face he says, "No, I don't want a picture of you people." And walks off.

He took about 5 steps before turning around, laughing to himself, and snapped a great pic of my family. My dad later remarked, "that was a good one."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/konvictkarl
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2014
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I'm a big fan of the Russian monarch of canyons,

Czar Chasm.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chimichangarific
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2017
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I don’t see the full picture of Parley’s canyon

I only parley see it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpeediestMoon1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2018
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I asked my dad about our itinerary for this summers vacation in the southwest. He said we will start at the south rim of the Grand Canyon.

It's the perfect jumping off point.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Synisive
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2018
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What do a bat and a canyon have in common?

Echolocation!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/acnine
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2017
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This happened recently. Was hiking with a friend in a canyon with good acoustics, when he shouted about a good price he got on his new sleeping bag.

When I asked him why he shouted that, he said he wanted to share 'echo-nomical.'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DocDerz
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2017
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While trekking Kings Canyon in Australia. "If this wasn't a canyon I would say it was 'gorge'ous here"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blackcoala
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2016
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So we visited the Grand Canyon...

My dad had never seen the Grand Canyon before. As soon as he saw it, the first thing he said was "Wow, I wonder how long it took them natives to build this!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/skaternewt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2013
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What did I just see suddenly and unexpectedly on Google Earth?

Sudden Canyon!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/space0watch
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
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Taken from the "Aron Ralston, who amputated arm to escape canyon, jailed in Denver" Thread. Seems like a dad joke.

http://i.imgur.com/iJlDlTP.jpg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Larrry_David
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2013
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Man. The pun is deep.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yugvijay
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2018
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My dad really raised the bar on this one..

> In a group text with my parents and siblings

Me: Ok all, weekly joke: What is the highest form of flattery?

...

Dad: A plateau?

Me: That's correct! Great job dad :).

[The joke was supposed to end here]

Mom: I don't get it..

Dad: Well then you must be in a canyon because it's over your head!

All: LOL!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/willsu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2014
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What natural wonder only cost one thousand dollars?

The grand canyon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wotmate
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2017
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We were driving past a dangerous rockfall area

Dad: Wow, I remember I went to a concert here before...

Me: Here? You mean this canyon?

Dad: Yeah, back in the 80s, I saw the Rolling Stones here!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cransrax
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2016
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A man goes to buy a horse (long)

So he finds the man who owns the horse. The owner takes him to the stable. The buyer asks to take the horse for a test ride.

 

"Okay," says the owner. "But I'm a retired church pastor. The horse will only go forward if you say, 'Praise the lord.' He will only stop moving if you say 'Hallelujah.' "

 

Feeling annoyed, the buyer says "That's fine," and he gets up on the horse. After the seller returns to the house, the buyer, mounted on the horse, whips the reins and says, "Hiyah!!" The horse doesn't move. "Yah," he said, spurring the horse. Still no movement. Feeling a little embarrassed and stupid, he complied to the owner's instruction. "Praise the Lord," he mumbled, and the horse began quickly trotting away from the stable.

 

Wow, the buyer thought, excited. I wonder how fast this horse can go. "Praise the Lord," he said, this time at normal volume. The horse sped up considerably.

 

Amazing! I must have this horse! the buyer thought. "Praise the Lord!" he shouted. "Praise the Lord!" And the horse kept speeding up. The stable behind them was no longer visible.

But the horse and the buyer were speedily approaching a huge canyon. Seeing this ahead, the buyer commanded, "St- stop! Whoaaa, horse!" But the horse kept the charge forward. "Hallelujah!" the buyer shouted. And the horse stopped at the edge of the vast canyon, with only inches of ground to spare.

Looking up to the sky, the buyer sighed in relief. "Praise the Lord."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/littlekuribandit
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2017
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Heard this one just moments ago...

So a frog walks into a bank to get a car loan. He walks over to Patricia Wack, who happened to be the loan officer. "Ms. Wack I would like to get a car loan, but I want the title in my name." Ms. Wack asks the frog if has any sort of collateral. He replis "well, all I have is this is this token I got from the Grand Canyon." Patricia tells him there is no way she can take that. Irritated the frog asks the see the manager, so Patricia calls the manager over and explains the situation. The manager looks at the frog, then the token, then Ms. Wack and proclaims, "That's a knick knack Patty Wack give the frog a loan."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/92sideoffries
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2014
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Secret meaning of farts

While preparing for our roadtrip to the Grand Canyon, my dad was asking everyone (my mom, brother, and I) if we needed to go to the bathroom before we leave. I was around 8 years old at the time, my brother was 5. I had some massive gas that day and my dad took note of it.

I said, "Dad, I don't need to go to the bathroom."

"RhinoWatson, yes you do. You know a fart is just a poo screaming to get out."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RhinoWatson
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2013
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Isn’t the Grand Canyon..

Just gorges.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/priv_rex
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2018
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What do you read while at the Grand Canyon?

Cliff notes.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2018
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Isn’t the Grand Canyon..

Just gorges.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/priv_rex
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2018
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[X-post from /r/puns] I'm a big fan of the Russian monarch of canyons,

Czar Chasm.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chimichangarific
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2017
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