What did the big candle say to the little candle?
Why can’t candles burn during the week?
Because they only burn on wick ends
What burns longer; a red candle or a blue candle?
Neither; they both burn shorter!
Why do they sell candles with lids?
How are mafia murders like candles?
What do you call a sale on birthday candles?
I was very poor growing up. On my 10th birthday we bought half a cake with 5 candles.
We put it against a mirror.
What do you call it when a candle eats another candle?
My wife just bought a $98 unscented candle.
What’s the difference between a candle and a skinny horseman?
One is a night light, and the other is a light knight.
I went to the candle store to celebrate my cake day...
They were having a blowout sale.
Told my wife I really liked her new pineapple scented candle
https://imgur.com/tlHbF9O
I got 99 candles, cuz she can’t buy one. [OC]
How do you make the candles on your cake really happy?
Just blow them out! They'll be delighted!!
What is the name of the assassin that only kills candles?
I wanted to buy a candle holder but the store didn't have one.
So I got a cake
-Mitch Hedberg
I'm thinking of starting a candle making company.
My family doesn't think it's a good idea, but I keep assuring them it makes scents.
I'm really enjoying this line of scented bathroom candles Keanu Reeves is selling
What kind of insurance do candles companies get?
They should make a film series about a guy who uses candles as weapons.
What do you call a candle made up of the melted remains of other candles?
I had a job at the candle store...
but became INCENSEd and quit.
Went to a party where everyone was dressed as a birthday candle.
My friend had a table candle featuring glitter and 100 fibrous bundles to light...
I'm burning a gold-scented candle.
It has a very rich aroma.
My Buddhist friend just gave me a “Nirvana” scented candle.
It smells like Teen Spirit.
How do angels light a candle?
With a match made in heaven
What did the oil lamp say to the flickering candle?
Do you want to go out sometime soon?
What did the candle say to the match?
What’s the best place to learn more about candles?
I remember the day the candle store burned down.
Everyone stood around and sang Happy Birthday.
Why isn't the candle factory more profitable?
Because they only make a few scents
Edit: reworded by request
We didn't have 19 candles. My dad said the cake was "4" my birthday.
When a candle says "soy candle," has it become self aware and fluent in spanish?
What's the best place to get information on candles
What parts of a fish are used to make candles?
what is a candles favorite movie
I bought my teenager candles for his room.
All you dads out there couldn’t hold a candle to my dad.
He makes gunpowder for a living.
The producers of John Wick 3 should come out with a line of promotional sented bathroom candles.
What is it called when a candle eats another candle?
You should go to the candle store...
They’re having a blowout sale.
What did the boy candle say to the girl candle?
Why did the candle quit her job?
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