I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
The doctor says it terminal.
Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
Do your worst!
How the hell am I suppose to know when itโs raining in Sweden?
Mathematical puns makes me number
Ants donโt even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.
But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.
We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
---Disclaimer: This is a continuation of a character sheet for the series There Will Be Scritches. It may not be to everyone's taste, it is not required reading, you will be able to enjoy the series having never read further. I intend to edit it as new characters are added and/or if details change. Characters are listed in order of first mention---
Name: Jeanne โBlitzโ Miyazaki
Sex: F
Occupation: Ambassador
Age (EEY): 65 (52 at meeting with Tcakqaal, 38 at Peace Accord)
Species: Human
Diet: Omnivorous
Manipulation: Bimanual (ten fingers, of which two thumbs)
Locomotion: Bipedal Plantigrade
Height: 178cm
Weight: 68kg
Hair Colour: Raven
Eye Colour: Black
Homeworld: Earth Cradleworld: Earth
Languages Spoken: English, Japanese, Russian, French, Korean, Tagalog, Swahili, Arabic, Navajo, New Norse (Icelandic, Faroese comprehensible), German, Spanish, Hindi, Telegu, Kazakh, Mongol, Farsi, Yoruba, Malagasy, Guarani, GB, GBSL
Sexual Preference: Straight Species Preference: Robo sapiens
First Mention: Pt. 6 First Appearance: Pt.6
Religious Persuasion: Buddhist-Shinto Syncretist
Familial Status: Married to Ez1026r583A โEzraโ
Alma Mater: Westminster College
Name: Ez1026r583A โEzraโ
Sex: None (male presenting)
Occupation: Ambassador
Age (EEY): 41 (29 at meeting with Tcakqaal)
Species: Robo sapiens
Diet: None (charges electrically by use of solar collection field)
Manipulation: Bimanual (ten fingers, of which two thumbs)
Locomotion: Bipedal Plantigrade
Height: 230cm
Weight: 200kg
Hair Colour: None
Eye Colour: Luminous Azure
Homeworld: Earth Cradleworld: Earth
Languages Spoken: All Known
Sexual Preference: Straight Species Preference: Humans
First Mention: Pt. 6 First Appearance: Pt.6
Religious Persuasion: Agnostic
Familial Status: Married to Jeanne โBlitzโ Miyazaki
Alma Mater: Westminster College
Name: Yetta
Sex: F
Occupation: None currently
Age (EEY): 25
Species: Pahadan
... keep reading on reddit โกHe lost May
Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"
Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies ๐
It really does, I swear!
And now Iโm cannelloni
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
And boy are my arms legs.
But thatโs comparing apples to oranges
Put it on my bill
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
Theyโre on standbi
BamBOO!
A play on words.
Calcium, nickel, neon
My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.
Pilot on me!!
Christopher Walken
Nothing, he was gladiator.
The bartender says, "Sorry, no minorsโ
