Yesterday I treated myself to a lovely bath. As I relaxed and watched Netflix on my phone in my sleep-deprived, hungover state, I had the most concise idea I've ever had. A single word: a seed pun that has since grown into a giant punflower that will fix Disney's perceived creative rutt and get them back on track. Instead of remaking gritty, live action versions of classic animations they should adapt a gritty, live action property into a kid friendly classic animation.
I present to you the trailer that will sell a million Disney Plus subscriptions:
The following trailer has been rated 'E' for everyone. May contain: graphic hugging, excessive naps, tickling, pantslessness. TIGGER WARNING
Voiceover starts as the screen fades from black to a sweeping shot of a rainforest at sunset: "There's an old saying in game rules enforcement: "The Hiders need to get lucky every time. The Seekers just need to get lucky once." [Text onscreen: 100,000 Acre Rainforest, Columbia - late 1980s] The camera pans around the aftermath of a ticklefight at one of the Don's largest labs. We can see a lot of sleeping workers surrounded by loose stuffing, piles of powder, and tightly wrapped parcels - the camera zooms in on one showing the label: "POLEN" [Subtitle, English: "POLLEN"]. The camera zooms in on our protagonists: PEA Agent Piglett PeΓ±ya standing over the napping body of the Don's best officers, La Tuiga (well known for bouncing, trouncing, flouncing, and finally pouncing on those the Don views as against his agenda). Out of breath after a long tickling, an exhausted agent Piglett says : "The m-m-most wonderful thing about him, was that he was the only one." His newly assigned partner Steve Murphy looks uneasy at the sight of so many sleeping bodies.
Montage time: shots of various main characters operating for and against the Cartel. An original song by Randy Newman about the dangers of being naughty plays in the background while we see snippets of what's to come: The Don's number 2, Roostavo looking over dozens of little red wagons filled with bricks of pollen, ready to ship to the heffalumps in Miami. We see Rabbito "Poison" Ramos having fun at a busy Rainforest cafe (chance for product placement?). The best pollen mule in the business, Sicareeyore, boards a crowded plane to Miami. PeΓ±ya and Murphy are having a heated discussion in their office: Murphy: "You need to involve me in your games - I came to 100,000 Acre Rainforest to play hide and seek, but you
... keep reading on reddit β‘So me and my girl are enjoying hillside picnic. I begin to poke at her freckles. She asks "If i didnt have freckles would you still love me?" I respond jokingly "No". She sits up quickly and says "I'm leaving!" then proceeds to crawl to my side, transforming me into the little spoon. I ask "I thought you left?", she replies "I am Left". All hell breaks loose.
