What do you call a sleepwalking nun?

A roamin' Catholic.

👍︎ 6k
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📅︎ Jul 18 2019
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Just leaving this here...
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👤︎ u/siyuze
📅︎ Nov 02 2017
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If you need to start a fire by rubbing sticks together, make sure they are the same.

Then you'll have a match.

👍︎ 3k
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📅︎ Jul 11 2017
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This girl came up to me today and said she recognised me from the vegetarian club...

I was confused because I'd never met herbivore.

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👤︎ u/v_cleaner
📅︎ Jul 27 2015
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Dadjoked my *now* ex-girlfriend while she was breaking up with me.

So, today my girlfriend broke up with me. To keep it short, we were together for a few month and everything happened really fast. Bla bla bla, she said something about how she always felt comfortable around me but never could develop any strong love feelings for me.

She: "This week I was thinking a lot about us, our relationship and future and I took off my 'cheesy being-in-love-glasses' Me: Well, I know you're still wearing your contacts..." (she actually did)

So I got that going for me which was nice. But now I'm sad.

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👤︎ u/Germerica
📅︎ Nov 15 2014
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What are the two most profane bones in the human body?

The blasfemurs

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📅︎ May 21 2018
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Did you hear about the skeleton who didn't go to church?

he was a blas-femur

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👤︎ u/Splaaaty
📅︎ Sep 01 2016
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My dad loves his coffee

Me: Hey, dad can I make you a cup of coffee? Dad: Sure Me: How do you take it? Dad: Like my women? Me: Hot and bla... Dad: NO PUBIC HAIR

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📅︎ Feb 26 2014
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What do you call a leg bone that won't stop hating on your gods?

A Blas-Femur

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👤︎ u/mopidozo
📅︎ Nov 19 2018
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Boy or girl?

Dad: your sister is pregnant!!!

Me: oh that's great news dad! Bla bla, etc etc... Any idea on the sex?

Dad: ............ Doggy style?

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👤︎ u/smegmagma
📅︎ May 21 2014
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