Once upon a time at the opposite of the beginning
At the beginning of the Common Era, people had no idea how to track years.
But then they did a complete 1 AD.
At the museum they're beginning to disassemble the mummies exhibit.
I guess that's a wrap then.
i'm beginning to feel like a pun god
Why did Luke Skywalker struggle with his training at the beginning?
Because he tried to force it.
How do German bread makers greet each other at the beginning of the day?
They say "Gluten Morgen!"
My lactose intolerant friend had some cheese at the beginning of our eight hour road trip today...
Since the very beginning, man has been panning for gold and using it as trade.
Our ancestors called it the prime-ore-deal soup
In the beginning , alphabet had only 25 letters .
In the beginning the god of diabetes said...
To make extra money, my professor forces all the students to buy his book at the beginning of the term.
I used to hate the lockdown in the beginning, but now that I have a full fridge, I am ok with it.
Scientists are calling it the Stock Home syndrome.
I was reading a history book, and apparently in the middle east there were hundreds of years where nocturnal predator birds used to fly around and ejaculate all over the place. The Arabic people would keep each other up to date on the latest attacks; and so marked the beginning of...
How did we know communism was doomed from the beginning?
I suspected my girlfriend was a ghost right from the beginning
Starting with the moment she walked through those doors.
The beginning of the book is so sad that I've just been able to cry for years...
But I think it's time to turn the page.
What is often at the beginning of a question
In the beginning, God created time...
He created it 1 hour at a time. But after he had created 24, he called it a day.
All the beginning of a decade/end of a decade memes are getting old.
I mean, they are so last year.
At the slaughterhouse, the cows were beginning to form bonds with me before I led them to be murdered...
I guess Stockyard Syndrome is real!
Why are most kids born in the beginning of September?
It's right after Labour Day.
A friend once fed me donkey meat without telling me. I should have known from the beginning, though; it tasted like ass.
One time I sung the beginning of the “Friends” theme song in the middle of class,
London Zoo is beginning it's annual stocktake...
And the pelican keepers warn that they could be facing some enormous bills.
I'm beginning to develop a fear of german sausages
I think it's for the wurst
TIL: At the beginning of his career, Kevin Spacey only played two dimensional characters.
He was then known as Kevin Planey.
Peavil has a beginning...
My daughter walk in, in the middle of a story and says "start from the beginning"
Me: starts making baby noises.
Her: what's that all about dad?
Me: I think that's how I began
Her: Big eyeroll while attempting to suppress giggles
Every baguette has a beginning...
I'm beginning to think most of the jokes here come from Laffy Taffy wrappers.
A man in the street started throwing words beginning with 'th' at me.
I managed to dodge this, there and then but I didn't see that coming!
The beginning of my next school project
I didn't complete the Scadanavian languages course; I did well enough at the beginning in Danish, Swedish, and Norweigian...
...but I just couldn't Finnish.
Springtime is almost here, the flowers are beginning to bloom and my alergies are going crazy....
Let me start at the beginning
I bought a dictionary from the library and realized someone had ripped out pages from the beginning.
They also ripped out pages from the the end. It just went from “bad” to “worse”.
The dad in me is beginning to show up
I asked my friend how exactly I might be related to one of my cousins...
Me: "So if my grandmother has a sister who happens to have a granddaughter, is she my second cousin?"
Friend: "Yeah.. I believe she is your second cousin"
Me: "So that means my children and her children are going to be minute cousins?"
Friend: "..."
my dad's joke since the beginning of time
context: there is a disagreement or argument of some kind.
dad:"I'll tell you what"
me:"what?"
dad:"what"
and he walks away smirking like he won.
They said the quality of my puns was beginning to plateau. I'm really proud though...
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.
My professor makes all the students buy his book at the beginning of the term to make some profit.
To make extra money, my university professor makes all his students buy his book at the beginning of the term.
My university professor forces the students to buy his book at the beginning of the semester.
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