They were going into Kodiak arrest
Hello all, what are some good bear puns/punny jokes, aside from the unbearable?
The problem with bears as a pun topic is that there are only 6 possible puns and most of them are stretches.
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bear double meaning with tolerate
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pandanother thing
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grizzly double meaning with horrific
4)kodiak double meaning with camera
5)koalalifications
6)and Ursidae the family classification can be shortened to sound like ursa and be used instead of "or so" like in the phrase "or so i was told".
Coworker found a loophole and itβs mostly dressed as a bear. Iβve used all my bear puns! Help me make more! Work at a gas station/pizza place
Funniest horse puns and jokes
A white horse walks into a pub and asks for a whisky. The landlord says: βHey, weβve got a whisky named after you.β The horse replies: βWhat, George?β
A horse trudges slowly into a pub and orders a drink. βEveninββ says the barman, βwhy the long face?β
A horse walks into a smart cocktail bar. The doorman says: βWait you canβt come in here without a tie.βThe horse goes out to his car, looks in the boot and gets a set of jump leads, which he ties around his neck.He goes back in and says to the barman: βThis alright?β The barman says: βHmm, okβ¦ but donβt be starting anything.β
A poorly-looking horse limps into a bar with a bandage round his head. He orders a glass of champagne, a vintage brandy and two pints of Guinness. He downs the lot and says to the barman: βI shouldnβt really be drinking this with what Iβve got?β βWhy, what have you got?β βAbout Β£2 and a carrot.β
Which side of a horse has more hair? The outside Whatβs a horseβs favourite TV show? Neighbours
A racehorse owner takes his horse to the vet. βWill I be able to race this horse again?,β he asks The vet replies: βOf course you will, and youβll probably win!β
Did you hear about the depressed horse? He told a tale of whoa!
A dead horse walks into a bar and orders a whisky.
βIβm sorry, sir,β says the barman. βWe donβt serve spirits..
A talking horse walks into a bar and approaches the manager. βExcuse me, good sir,β the horse says, βare you hiring?β The manager looks the horse up and down and says, βSorry, pal. Why donβt you try the circus?β The horse nickers. βWhy would the circus need a bartender?β
Did you hear about the man who was hospitalized with six plastic horses inside him? The doctor described his condition as stable.
What did the horse say when it fell? βIβve fallen and I canβt giddyup!β
Q. What does it mean if you find a horseshoe? A. Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.
A man rode his horse to town on Friday. The next day he rode back on Friday. How is this possible? The horseβs name was Friday.
Why did the pony have to gargle? Because it was a little horse!
What did the horse say when it fell? Iβve fallen and I canβt giddyup!
What did the teacher say when the horse walked into the class? Why the long face?
What do you call a horse that lives next door? A neigh-bo
... keep reading on reddit β‘
Why they are always stuffed!
A solar bear
Bonus: what do you call a bear that practices dentistry?
A molar bear
Nature abhors a vacuum.
Polar opposite bears
I had a Koala tea time.
cos they can't get the wrapper off.
Now, it can ride a bike without stabilisers.
B
Kebab Wrap.
You cut a hole in the ice Line the hole with peas When the polar bear bends over to take a pea, Ya kick it in the icehole!
βNo thanks, Iβm stuffed!"
Camembert
"Why the big pause?" asks the bartender. The bear shrugged, "I'm not sure, I was born with them"
A pan-duh!
First drill a hole in the ice and line it with green peas. When the polar bear comes to take a pea, kick him in the icehole!
(Told to me by my dad at dinner this evening)
Grizzly looks perplexed and replies "Ive had them all my life"
Because they have bear feet.
B
Edit: Thank you for hugz!
He has selfie steam issues.
Because it was bipolar...
One bear.
things could get grizzly.
A Goldy-smack with a cold sack in a cul de sac, which is more than a bear with beer could bare.
wHo the hEll would beLieve such a thing can hapPen.
An ice burger
A gummy bear
Because it was unbearable to live there anymore...
The bartender asked "why the big pause"
The bear replies "I was born with them"
Trying to think these up has been unbearable
Dead. You get dead.
A circumpolar bear.
B
Now it can ride a bike without stabilisers.
Gummy Bear
