Baseball Player Puns

He leads the league in Arby eyes.

Put me in coach.

Naturally

He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.

He earned the nickname “the machine” for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.

And the day he retired a reporter asked him “How does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?”

Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. “What do you mean?” He said.

The reporter clarified “literally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!”

Hugh looked dejected and disappointed “yeah, my greatest failure...”

“What do you mean?” Said the reporter incredulously.

Hugh let’s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.

“I’ve been aiming left this whole time”

They've been hitting everyone with their.bat

That took a lot of balls.

Swing

The Pitcher

Because they’re ALL IN CAPS!

I didn't catch that.

Nice catch.

It’s a spit spat

Bunt cake

(Say it slowly) A son of a Pitch-er

Because he is much more likely to make a great catch!

Bath o’ Mets

Because he was around bats all the time.

His name was Rosè Prosecco.

Because they’re always safe at home

If they pick up both, they'd fall on their butt.

Hit and run.

He had a good eye, mate

One. A-Rod

They stand next to the fans

David Justice (MLB Commentators provide an endless flow of Dad Jokes)

...and became a pour pitcher

He was a little pitchy.