I was checking out at the grocery store today and the bagger was holding my stuff over the shopping cart and asked: β€œsir, would you like to go out with the cart?”. To which I replied β€œoh, no thanks I’m actually married”. My poor son looked mortified. Dad joke status ACHIEVED.
πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DaFunkJunkie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Grocery Bagger: Do you want the milk in a bag?

Dad: That's okay, just leave it in the carton.

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
🚨︎ report
At the grocery store the other day, the bagger asked the woman in front of me, "Paper or plastic?" She responded, "It makes no difference to me. You choose." The bagger explained that he isn't allowed to, and that she had to choose. This upset her quite a bit, which was confusing to me.

I thought it was common knowledge that baggers can't be choosers.

πŸ‘︎ 624
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/massivevivid
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the loaf of bread say when the grocery bagger squished it?

DOUGH!!!!!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ziegss
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Grocery store bagger asked me if I wanted the milk put in the bag or not

I told her no thanks please leave it in the carton

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tswaves
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
As a bagger in a grocery store, I hear the same dad joke over and over.

Me: Would you like your milk in a bag sir? Random Dad: No, I'll just keep it in the jug. Obligatory laugh because I work in customer service

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Renickulous333
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2014
🚨︎ report
At the grocery store yesterday: "I left my phone in the freezer" said the bagger to the cashier...

and then I said "I hope you don't plan on making any cold calls, there are laws against that!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/galexy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2014
🚨︎ report
GROCERY STORE CHECKER: "Paper or plastic?" DAD: "Either, I’m bisacktual.”
πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AshleyJack
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Even in places where grocery workers are allowed to unionize people who do bagging work have no say on what goes into each new contract.

Baggers can't be choosers after all.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the person putting your groceries in a bag at grocery store always ask where you want your eggs and your loaf of bread?

Because baggers can’t be choosers.

πŸ‘︎ 98
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thatoneguykc
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2018
🚨︎ report
[request] Prom help?

So I'm asking my coworker to prom tomorrow, we both work at a grocery store (she's a cashier and I'm her bagger), all I can think of for a sign right now is something along the lines of "bagging a prom date". Can anyone think of any better grocery store puns for an ask?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wrety94
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2017
🚨︎ report
If you sack groceries for a living, you really have no choice but to put everything in.

'cause as they say, baggers can't be choosers.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shahooster
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2017
🚨︎ report
Do you want the milk in the bag?

When my dad gets milk at the grocery store sometimes the grocery bagger will ask him "do you want the milk in the bag?" he'll say "No thanks, you can just keep it in the jug. Last time it was really big mess." It gets a laugh about half of the time.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bricktwin
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2015
🚨︎ report
Dad joke from my grocery store days.

I worked at a grocery store for several years, sometimes as a bagger. Sometimes my interactions went like this:

Me: paper or plastic?

Customer: it doesn't matter, you choose

Me: I'm sorry, I can't do that

Customer: why not?

Me: because baggers can't be choosers

(Groans)

πŸ‘︎ 200
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NoUrImmature
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2015
🚨︎ report
Customer got me good.

I'm a bagger at a grocery store that does carry out. Also, this was last summer in the southern US where it's hot as hell.

I walked this older fellow out and loaded his groceries in his car and started to walk away when he fished his hand into his pocket, walking after me. He said "Can you take tips?" "No, sir--" "Drink plenty of water."

Haven't seem him since.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/YouGotAte
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2015
🚨︎ report
This one really had me laughing!

So I'm a cashier and I've heard nearly every tired joke that customers say to get a laugh out of me. To be honest, they usually only get a pity chuckle and a half-hearted smile. But this guy... he was one Funny Old Dude

This guy and his wife walk up to my register to check out. They look like they could be older than my grandparents. Him, his wife and I were just make cordial small talk, when my coworker who was a bagger today walks up.

>>Bagger: "Would you like paper or plastic today, sir?"

>>FunnyOldDude: "What was that, son?"

>>B: "Paper or plastic today?"

>>FOD: "What ever you want, man. I'm bi-sack-ual."

I busted out laughing. I never expected to hear that! And definitely not from this old white guy!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hi_im_x
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2014
🚨︎ report
I don't like having to decide between paper or plastic.

Why can't baggers be choosers?

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/brendan_07
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do they always ask if you want paper or plastic in line at the grocery store?

Because baggers cant be choosers

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/milwaukee1919
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.