Kid: Why do you stand on one leg while you get money out of the ATM?
Dad: I’m checking my balance.
Did you know that an ATM has 80 Million in it?
That's why it's called 80M.
I wish thought controlled ATMs existed
They make cents when you think about it.
Saw a one-legged man at the ATM this morning.
He was checking his Balance.
Did you hear about the ATM that got addicted to money?
It suffered from withdrawals.
Think a lot of us can relate to this atm.
Last night at the ATM, An old lady asked me to help check her balance
A little old lady at the ATM asked me to help check her balance.
All it took was one good shove to tell it was terrible.
How much money is inside the ATM?
Banks need to get better at restocking these ATMs
This is now the fifth one that has insufficient funds.
I drew £30 out of the ATM earlier. A couple of minutes later I heard the sound of 'Nessun Dorma' coming from my wallet.
"Must be those three tenners" I thought to myself
How much money does an ATM hold?
Worlds first ATM turned 50 today
I thought about robbing an ATM.
I know a lot of jokes about cash machines. I just can't think of one atm
Wikipedia says there are only 2 atms in Antarctica.
But you shouldn't use them unless you want your assets frozen.
Be Careful Standing On One Leg At The ATM!!!!
Worst way to check your balance. crickets
A fox went to a nearby ATM machine, and took out his card.
A girl nearby and a monkey screamed, "Swiper, no swiping!"
I saw a guy standing on one leg at an atm
Confused, i asked him what he was doing, he said he was just checking his balance
They should stock ATM's better.
I went to 4 different ones and they all said insufficient funds!
I was standing in line at an ATM
There were 4 people ahead of me, and the ATM itself is inside a small structure with big glass windows that could pass as a miniature storefront. An older man walked by us and yelled "Must be a sale on money!"
Only I laughed. There was even a dad in line with his daughter who didn't get it.
Why did the man walk on one foot to the ATM ?
Because he wanted to know his balance 🏃
A talking, mindreading ATM would be an Automatic Telling ATM Machine...
You can use your library card to take out money at an ATM...
... but you have to return it within two weeks.
"Dude I think that atm machine just lost a few pounds"
"Dude I think that atm machine just lost a few pounds," my friend told me after I withdrew some cash.
"Actually, I think it goes by USD here"
It was a proud remark of mine I had last night.
I was going to go into a long explanation of how to access an ATM machine but...
...let's put a pin in that for a moment.
Getting really annoyed now, this is the 6th ATM I've been to thats had "insufficient funds"!!
ATM message after a failed Comedian tried to withdrawal from his account-
"Cannot withdrawal, insufficient puns."
Damn ATM.
I went to the only ATM in town to draw some money; but they didnt have a pencil.
The ATM
My mom was at the ATM entering her password. Suddenly, a wild dad appeared and said : "hah, your password is so easy to remember. The characters are all X's. "
We all sighed deeply as he laughed uncontrollably, and proceeded our journey in Life ignoring what he just said.
World's first ATM turned 50 today
...happy birthday dad.
^its ^a joke ^about ^^DAD
My mom pulls a dad joke at the ATM.
My mom and I park in front of the ATM so she can get some cash. I wait in the passenger seat as she goes to the ATM. I look up just in time to see her turn around and start jumping up and down saying "I won! I won!" like she just hit the jackpot at a slot machine. Oh gosh, that's embarrassing...
I work at a pawnshop/payday loan store and the payday loan girl was trying to fill the store ATM..
Girl: You guys have any twenties?
Boss: Go fish!
There was a one legged man at the ATM this morning..
He was checking his balance
I was at an ATM and an old lady asked if I could help check her balance..
An old woman at the ATM asked if I could help her check her balance.
I pushed her and she fell over.
How much money does an ATM hold?
I was using the ATM when an old lady came up to me and asked to check her balance
I met a man standing on one leg at an ATM. I asked him what he was doing.
He said “Oh, I was just checking my balance”
Was at the ATM when an old lady asked me if I could help her check her balance
So I pushed her and she fell over
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